Attractive Nuisance

The Lesson I Learned From Robyn

2011-10-02T12:31:00.003-06:00

This weekend Zach and I have been busy attending the semi-annual general conference of my church--the Church of Jesus of Christ of Latter-Day Saints. (You may access it at: lds.org.) During these times, I find myself reflecting more often on my current life, past circumstances, and how I can become better moving forward. Lately I've been thinking of one particular scripture as it relates to recent experiences.

See, The Book of Mormon starts out following one family. Throughout the book, people separate into different groups designated by the suffix -ites. But in the most peaceful part of the book, it says, "There were no robbers, nor murderers, neither were there Lamanites, nor any manger of -ites; but they were in one, the children of Christ, and heirs to the kingdom of God." (4 Ne. 1:17)

I kept thinking about how relevant this scripture and this attitude is today. Because we all want to feel needed and wanted, we align ourselves with different groups. As a result, we consciously or unconsciously alienate others and become divisive--sometimes over minor issues.

I am guilty of this. I remember the first time I did this. When I was in elementary school, there was a girl named Robyn. She didn't dress very well and she never had her hair combed. As a result, people teased her. In order to fit in with the majority, I teased her as well. One night over dinner, I brought it up with my family, possibly hoping that they would vindicate my behavior and engage in the teasing as well. My parents' answer surprised me. My mom said, "She probably doesn't dress well because she doesn't have much money." And then I asked, "Well what about her hair? She never brushes it." My mom replied, "Maybe she doesn't have a brush or she was never taught good hygiene and she needs someone to help her." My perspective completely changed. My mom gave me money to pick out new clothes for her and to buy her a fancy brush and some other things. It was the end of the school year and even still, I was nervous to give the gift to her because I didn't want anyone to see me talking to her. i was also nervous that by giving it to her i would be hurting her pride and someone letting her in on our secret gossip-fest.

In reality, none of that happened. I nervously walked up to Robyn and handed her the gift. I told her I thought she might like it. she thanked me and lit up inside. She was so grateful, and I could tell most of it came from someone just coming up and talking to her. I have never forgotten about Robyn or about that moment. But sadly, it still has not prevented me from doing this again. And I guess it's hit me now more than ever because recently I have felt like Robyn.

It is not fun to feel on the outside of a group. It is not fun to feel like you are the one who unites a group--uniting a group in their common opinion of you. The silver lining of this feeling is the further impact it has on me to ensure that I am never the cause of someone else feeling alienated. I remember again the good and lasting feeling I had when I handed Robyn the present. It's great to know that I can do that again and again by being simply being a friend.

Oh, and I'd really love to find out where Robyn is today and be her friend. Robyn Reed: are you out there?

Tyler Glenn Chest Hair

2011-07-29T13:49:00.003-06:00

Okay, does anyone else check out their blog statistics? One of my favorite features is looking at search terms people enter to get to my site. My favorite one from this week was "tyler glenn chest hair." How in the world did someone get my blog from that search term?

So I have a question for you out there: whether you're a friend, a family member, or someone who googled "Nate Ruess laughing" and got my blog instead. What are some of the crazy search terms that lead people to your blog?

New Post Over at the Pendletones.com

2011-07-27T10:20:00.001-06:00

I'm slowly phasing out this blog. So if you follow this blog, go ahead and change the address to Pendletones.com. You'll be glad you did.

While you're there, revel in the differences between Zach and me.

Wedding Dress Help

2011-07-20T23:26:00.004-06:00

Tonight, the wedding dress consultant got mad at me for not having a dress picked out yet. The problem is that I have all the odds stacked against me.

* I need a modest dress with sleeves

* I want a dress to fit in with the classic vintage (1920s)theme

* I need it to be in my size (I currently fit into wedding dresses from sizes 8-14)

* I need a dress that looks good with my body type (probably the hardest one to satisfy) A-line and Empire waist types look best on me (It has to fit my larger chest, small waist, and hide my enormous hips)

* I don't want to spend a fortune

So...does anyone have any suggestions? Or does anyone know someone who has a spare wedding dress lying around that might possibly match that description?

I'm freaking out here.

Check Us Out!

2011-07-20T13:07:00.002-06:00

Okay, I know it's in its infancy stage right now, but I'm too excited that it exists to even wait for it to look perfect. So everyone go check out my new blog at Pendletones.com

Leave us a comment and tell us what you think!

McKinney Falls

2011-07-11T11:55:00.008-06:00

A couple weekends ago, my sister's family and I went park hopping in Austin. Our first stop was McKinney Falls State Park. When we're not in the worst drought in South Texas history, there are actual running waterfalls and natural springs where people swim.

Although it was probably beautiful when there was more water, it still was fun.

There were these neat bridges, tall trees, and ancient caves where native Americans used to live.

But the highlight was the friend we met in the visitor's center. Don't you just love her hair?

Motivation

2011-06-13T17:27:00.002-06:00

I want to lose weight.

Diet, exercise, rinse, and repeat. I get it. But today I learned the most inspiring way to lose weight.

TRY ON WEDDING DRESSES.

Nothing makes me feel gross and smushy more than trying on a wedding dress and realizing I'd like to be about four sizes smaller. So if I keep it up and try on one wedding dress a day until I get married, I may actually drop four sizes. Here's to hoping.

Newly Engaged Debut

2011-06-11T15:39:00.003-06:00

My nephew, Christian, is a novice producer. He's learning a lot of things, most notably how to work a camera. But he also wrote a comedy sketch featuring Mrs. Smith (an intelligence tester at school) and Stewart (a less-than-intelligent student). If you can forgive the shaky camera work, I think it's pretty funny.

This was also filmed about 24 hours after Zach and I got engaged.

Enjoy:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7a01uuwh08

Tulips Are My Favorite Flower

2011-05-25T14:58:00.014-06:00

...and Zach is my favorite man.

(Behold Zach. I tell him he looks like a muppet. This picture proves that I'm right.)

Zach and I have been friends for almost two years now. It was a cordial friendship while I cycled through dating several different men. Those guys were great, and I never planned on dating Zach ever. Then something happened to Zach where he got his heart broken in a really big way in December. We were studying for finals together when things were falling apart, so I tried my best to make every experience positive for him--as positive as studying about marijuana distributors and cocaine addicts could be (It was criminal procedure, guys. Not my choice).

When we came back from the break in January, I continued to spend time with Zach, hoping to help him recover and hoping to help him not lose faith in dating or women or both. In the process of serving him, listening to him, and understanding what he was going through, I started to develop strong emotional connections with him.

Zach became an even better friend. We started dating. Although it was slow and casual, my care and concern for him and his well-being deepened. I got to know not just the "crisis-mode Zach" but the fun Zach, the silly Zach, the rapper Zach, the wicked smart Zach, the thoughtful Zach, well you get it--the many sides of Zach.

(We went on our very first road trip to Vegas. Think Hangover combined with That Thing You Do. That was our trip.)

(And we went to the Beatles LOVE show.)

It was wonderful to learn about him, to serve him, and to become so close to him, but at the same time I was constantly getting bogged down by external forces that made me doubt and question daily whether we should be together.

(An acrostic I wrote on my doorstep before one of our dates.)

Then something serious happened. Because these experiences are so special to me, I will leave most of them off this blog, but I just want to touch on some of them. My mission president said some things at the mission reunion in early April that really struck me. He also said some pretty profound, even prophetic things. That experience, coupled with a few more during General Conference weekend, led me to the largest, cheesiest display of affection I have ever undertaken.

I wrote down 100 things that I love about Zach, coupled them with a note, placed them inside a case with a bass guitar (he plays bass), and left it on his parent's doorstep where he was staying that weekend.

A few more things happened, and I realized how much I loved Zach and how patient I was willing to be for him to do the things he needed to do to figure out his life--to get back to normal and to be happy again. I decided not to care about any external factors and just to focus on loving Zach and showing him the respect and patience he deserved.

(This was a pivotal night--a day that will live in infamy.)

Over time, though, I realized that resolve was harder to keep than it was to say. And another wonderful guy came into my life who was ready to date me, to commit to me, to serve me, and to love me, without the constant relationship-nurturing that it seemed our relationship required.

I was happy in my new relationship, but I never felt the deep, abiding connection that I did with Zach. From the moment I broke up with Zach, Zach had begun an elaborate scheme to try to "win me back." Yeah right, I thought. He had his chance. I was convinced that this was "crisis mode" behavior--that he was acting on impulse and that he was not really like this.

I didn't speak to him for a week. His friends, his family members, and our mutual friends sent sincere and heartfelt text messages and gchats my way about how hurt he was and how I needed to at least talk to him. And I felt bad for Zach. So I did just that.

I talked to him. And we spent time together. Then we talked some more. Days passed. After I realized he hadn't gone crazy but that he had just realized a little slower than me how strong his feelings were, we continued to date.

And I have never been happier. I was always happy with Zach before, and I loved him just the way he was, but now when I see the Zach who actually reciprocates feelings, I am blown away. He is the world's biggest sweetheart. And the funny thing is, I didn't even need or expect a sweetheart. I just wanted a really close friend.

Luckily Zach is that and so much more.

(He took me to Thanksgiving Point's Tulip Festival after finding out that tulips were my favorite flower.)

(Sorry for the sap. I just thought I talk a lot about the drama of dating that it's time for me to be a little vulnerable and actually share a sweet story.)

Grades

2011-05-17T14:36:00.002-06:00

I will be so happy for the day that my performance and success in life is results based and not grades based. When I write appellate briefs, I want the outcome to be my client winning the appeal, not receiving an A- in drafting. When I become a mother, I want my teaching techniques to my children translate into well-mannered and educated offspring, not a B+ in Child Development.

But until that day, it's nice to see straight As on my transcript from last semester, if only for a small while.

Fame and Fortune

2011-05-16T12:47:00.002-06:00

Hello Internet,

I have a nephew.
He is pretty neat.
He's only 11 years old,
But he's 100 percent sweet.

He likes to learn new stuff
and finds it rather fun.
Instead of getting dirty
he likes to get things done.

So he and his best friend
Made a film called World War 3
Then they made a commercial
And sent it along to me.

He said he wants to be famous
And fame equals a youtube view
So if you love me or him or youtube
You'll click below to make his dreams come true.

Thank you. Love, Sara.

Christian's Commercial--Click here

P.S. I'll post World Ward 3 when it becomes available on DVD. Check back soon.

I am happy to stay single forever.

2011-05-06T11:55:00.000-06:00

Really.

Music Rubbers

2011-05-03T19:00:00.015-06:00

I'm SOOOOO grateful I have musically talented friends. I hope that some of their talent rubs off on me. The reason I'm gushing over my musical friends is that I just developed a whole bucket load of pictures from the past year and I noticed a common theme: concerts, jam sessions, music after parties, and moments that should've had their own soundtrack.

Here is a little sampling of the wonderfulness that was my musical year.

This is Rhett and me in Vegas. What's musical about it? I'm wearing a "Fun." shirt. What's cool about this picture? My camera's lens broke, so we just asked the drunk woman who took it to point it in our general direction and we'd find out later if the photo would develop. Turns out it did:

These are pictures of my hot (married) former Temple Square mission companion and me at Candlelight Serenade at Thanksgiving Point last summer:

Then, what a surprise, I bumped into my BFF from my freshman year and later but less-close friend from a very hilarious circumstance that I would recount here if this blog were private. Alas it is not. Here is Tyler Glenn (of Neon Trees) and Ashley Mollerup:

And then at Travis' recording studio post Empirates show at Velour:

And then Ben and me with this dude from Idaho whom we met at the Empirates show, who we invited to the after party, who subsequently came. He was pretty legit. But I lost his business card. If you recognize this man, please call me at 1-800-FIND-HIM:

Then some crazies got ahold of my camera and took crazy pictures. I can't identify the people. (Actually I can, I just shouldn't.)

Two members of "Good Manor," a band I managed, waiting to receive their business checking accounts at Wells Fargo.

Here is the opening act at a house show we threw last year. In the background is my future ex-boyfriend, Tanner with his soon-to-be ex girlfriend, Carolyn. Fun memories.

And I took Leland to that same house show, where we made creme brulee and made everyone feel like we had planned pyrotechnics as part of the ambience. Truthfully we just wanted brulee on our creme:

This is my sister-in-law Maria, her sister-in-law Virginia (or something. I don't remember), and me after my one and only 5K in Richfield, Utah on July 5th. My official time was 23:21 and 5th in my age division. That's why I will never run another 5K again. How does this relate to music, you ask? Well, to train for this run I made myself a play list of several "pump me up" songs so that at certain times during the run I'd know "Hey, when Miley Cyrus comes on, I should be at mile 1" and "Garth is singing: you better reach the finish line!" So yeah. There you go:

And then the best of all--my bro. Last New Year's Eve we had a little impromptu karaoke party at the lake house. Well when we were all done and just chatting and playing relaxing card games, Chris (my brother) went over to the karaoke machine and just popped in song after song, singing along. We rang in the New Year with his voice. At one point, I looked at the watch so I could document how long he sang straight through. I think it turned out to be about 70 minutes. He's a champ.

In the mood again

2011-05-02T15:31:00.003-06:00

More haikus anyone?

I'm a little rusty but after someone wrote a gorgeous haiku for me last night, I got inspired.

Since the first I thought
That it couldn't get any
Better. I was wrong.

Hope is power that
leads from a great present to
A better future.

Is this history
Repeating itself? Or was
I right the first time?

All A's on transcript
Make me feel good about me.
You make me feel best.

Writing in journals
Is cathartic. Writing on
Hearts is dangerous.

More to come when I get over this obvious writer's block.

Daily dose of haikus

2011-04-07T13:36:00.002-06:00

One, two three, four, five
My hands and thumbs are alive
I am not a monkey.

To the finish line
My mind continues to race.
But my body's weak.

I want everything.
And I won't let you say no.
Or I won't want it.

Here's the thing: I love,
But I'm also bad at math.
How much can I have?

Worry and worry
And stress and binge and freak out
All for it to end.

Competitiveness
Seems like such a good thing but
It's so cancerous.

When I was little,
My mom made me clean dishes.
Kitchens drowned in soap.

I have five siblings.
I love them all equally
But all differently.

Don't need to be friends.
I just need to win, his heart
Will never be yours.

Time was on my mind
When I was wishing on stars
Now I just want change.

I mean currency.
If I could have money, I'd
Buy your happiness.

I hope that would work.
If it didn't, I think I
Know some other ways.

Like, for example,
I could make you bacon each
Morning. You'd love that.

Or always take out
the trash when it overflows.
I even mow lawns.

But not very well.
I think I might be sexist
Because I think men

Should do manly chores.
Or maybe I'm just lazy
And should learn new things.

Here is the problem:
I can neither change oil
Nor sew a button.

Then what can I do?
I can interpret cases
And write about them.

I can have fun with
Other peoples' money, And
Be grateful for it.

I can make music
And recognize the beauty
All over the world.

But first I must go
And see the world for myself
Not just through pictures.

I secretly think
My dad's promise for a cruise
Is all just a sham.

But I deal with it
Because he paid for law school
For which I'm thankful.

Class is starting soon
But not soon enough. Running
out of good topics.

I hope you like me.
I hope we stay the same, but
better with grey hair.

Joe's Haikus

2011-04-07T04:36:00.002-06:00

Never get so attached to a poem that you forget truth that lacks lyricism.

You know those people who just seem to speak in iambic pentameter? Yeah, me neither. But some people definitely sound more poetic than others. When I got on my haiku kick, I noticed my friend, Joe Alisa, was more prone to post Facebook status updates in haiku form unknowingly. It's awesome. So in honor of Joe, I'd like to give a sampling of some of his poetic statuses molded to fit the haiku form. Enjoy!

Sitting on the couch
With kid, watching Breakin 2:
Electric Bug'loo

Trying to finish
But dreaming of the IHOP
Future midnight run?

How many people
Are writing their substantial
writing papers here?

Weather forecasting
is a dead art. Now we have
Stating obvious.

So much for the happy
Happy, joy Motorcycle
Day that I had planned.

Hotwheels this morning
at 6:30? Do we have
to? But I love it.

I'm Poly so I
like the Poi. I'm a Cougar
and I like the POY.

Crazy accident
On the way to school. Full sized
van flipped on its side.

Shout out to law peeps.
If you're not using all your
tickets, I need some.

One month left to go
and I finally make it
in a web story.

Shout out to law peeps.
Anyone have good cases
On Sharia Law?

I thought giving Joz
A bottle would help him go
To sleep. I was wrong.

Taught him everything
He knows. I really didn't
teach him anything.

Yo to my classmates.
I found a book today in a room.
Did someone lose one?

Doesn't feel so good.
You wanna buy a bulldog?
Drive-by Jimmering. (a composite)

Haiku Wednesday

2011-03-30T18:39:00.002-06:00

I think you can tell my mood by the type of haikus I write. Obviously. I can't believe I'm sharing this; I'm not usually an art-sharer. I like to create art for my own benefit; so feel special that you are getting the first wave of Sara's public creativity.

Don’t dig in old dirt,
Except to plant new flowers
Where love and hope blooms.

The future’s brighter
Than any past memory.
Here’s hoping that’s true.

I’m sure there were times
Where life was a lot harder
Than I give credit.

My rock all along
Has been right in front of me;
Now I can see it.

The Book of Mormon and Daily Haiku

2011-03-29T21:02:00.003-06:00

I want to see The Book of Mormon musical SOOOO badly.

I'm going to New York in two months. When I'm there, I will see it for sure. Anyone interested in coming with me, let's rock the shows.

-SEP

Haiku of the day
Today was so long
And full of productive things.
Make it continue.

Haiku Heaven

2011-03-28T01:06:00.006-06:00

I'm convinced sleep is like a temperamental train; you can buy a ticket, but if you aren't on the platform when it comes (and you never know when it'll come), you may miss it completely. That's what happened tonight.

So what do I do?
When I'm stuck on sleep's platform?
I write these haikus:

Okay but seriously: My modern dance teacher asked us to write a haiku and choreograph a dance that symbolizes the haiku. So I started with haikus that are easily interpretable through movement:

Snow drips off the trees;
Wake up from hibernation;
Spring has greeted us.

AND

I hear the tide crash.
It masks the loud screams of your
Unresponsiveness.

Then, because I can't sleep, I continued to write and write and write and write. I'm afraid to share these haikus because at one point I think creative Sara dug too deep and personal with stuff she should not be sharing. But hopefully the true meaning will be lost on this audience. And hopefully you'll just get a kick out of some really cool/really lame/really weird haikus.

Cap and Gown in hand:
What took me three years to build
Is so quick to end.

They said if I shout,
I would hear my echo back.
I wait, and nothing.

Playing games is fun,
But what if your opponent
Thinks it is real life?

Your words produce tears
That music can drink away,
But not forever.

This life is to live.
Purgatory, though, I’ve learned
Can be hell on earth

Haikus are easy
When they lack feeling and depth.
It’s overrated.

I’m sorry I went,
I’m sorry I stayed; Forgive:
It’s a dirty word.

Believe me for now,
But don't believe me always.
I don't believe me.

Movement, song, and sport
Were such a part of my youth.
Now what do I have?

It's easy to blame,
But harder to see the truth.
We cannot face it.

Russian raises voice
To her Chinese boyfriend, Now
Starting World War Three?

Pay me for my words;
Pay me for understanding;
Don’t pay for my love.

Two princesses here:
One has rocks; one has knockers.
Which do you prefer?

Never thought one day
I’d ever find myself here.
Don’t know if that’s good.

I wish not to lie,
But it gets me what I want.
You are what I want.

Remember the beach?
The warm tide and crabs at night,
Being young was fun.

I can’t forget you
Even though it’s been five years
You’re a part of me.

If I had said yes,
Would I be the person now
That I want to be?

Kweller Forever
Reminds me of the city
And you on the train.

Tulips in winter
And love in the fall. Summer
Is for breaking up.

My bed is calling,
But my dreams just inspire
To keep creating.

Friends come in and stay.
You serve them wine and bad cheese
And they go away.

I like you, I think.
But I think things that are wrong.
Perhaps there's no love.

Protecting her heart
Was what you wanted to do,
And now mine has stopped.

Lying never works
Nor does telling the truth, though.
What's a girl to do?

When you said "Goodbye,"
John wrote a song about it.
Now I say, "Hello."

Why is she still up?
And screaming at her boyfriend?
Break up all ready!

The house smells funny
Maybe it's the third day that
Food has been left out.

Why do girls hate girls,
When the boy does something wrong?
I won't ever know.

I hope I have kids
To shape, love, mold, and care for
Who am I kidding?

Some dreams work better
When you pretend they'll happen.
I do that with you.

If I was Iraq,
Would resources motivate
Your swift invasion?

Click here to read my haikus inspired by Facebook status updates.

News Feed Poetry

2011-03-28T00:34:00.003-06:00

I got sick of tapping into my deep psyche (I'm convinced now that the more "on a roll" you get with Haikus, the more you dig up stuff that should be left undisturbed.) So instead, I thought it would be fun to use people's Facebook statuses as inspiration for haikus. Some statuses hardly needed editing. Some required imagination and interpretation on my part. Either way, they're interesting to read, I think.

Experience joy
Thinking I had no chocolate
Then spotting the light.
--B. Daire

What’s up with all these?
Cute babies drive me crazy!
I’ll never have kids.
--W. Lee Chen

Oh Sick! A brownie!
Wait, it’s just a bag of dirt.
This can’t fill my needs.
--M. Grow

I thought I knew best
Not to take that blasted nap
Why did I give in?
--M. Heaton

So glad for weekends
Recentering, relaxing
It has been perfect
--H. Haslem

To ski or snowboard?
The final decision waits
Until next season
--S. Wilson

Had a crappy day.
It ended better than hoped;
Thank you family.
--A. Byam Gardner

In my family,
Hearing: "Well that didn’t suck,"
Is a compliment.
--W. White

I know that He Lives.
The Redeemer gives comfort.
So does this sentence.
--D. Sparish

Don’t click on the link
That asks if you’ve seen a pic.
It’s bad; I got hacked.
--L. Weatherholtz

It’s time to go home.
Enough Substantial Writing
Fail for one weekend.
--J. Alisa

At one point today
31 people were here.
Big families rock!
--C. Taylor

And it came to pass
Tomorrow the PTA
Would rule the people.
--M. Fitzner

Shout out to law peeps:
Anyone have good cases
On Sharia Law?
--J. Alisa

Great Sunday today!
I love being LDS.
And I love the church.
--A. Paz

Behind in classes,
Stressed out of my mind. And yet,
We bought our first home!
--C. Hutchings

27 weeks
With Braxton Hicks contractions
Should I be worried?
-S. Rauch

Thinking of summer
Prague, Croatia, and Nauvoo
Paninis with friends
--J. Tibbitts

Most beautiful day
Every day should be perfect
Grilled steaks and nice walks.
--S. Lindberg

Delicious cookies
Given one hour ago
Already they’re gone.
--K. Post

Husband eats breakfast
Sardines with lemon juice, So
Is cookie dough wrong?
--M. Carmen Chinison

Dreaming of bathrooms;
Also, my car got stolen.
Wonder what this means.
--S. Zollinger

Those who danced were thought
To be insane by those who
Could not hear music.
--P. Deming

Cold and pouring rain
My car window won't roll up
Five hours to drive.
--H. Hassell

A guy in our ward
Looks like Paul Bunyan and sings
Soprano in choir.
--T. Merrill

My mind will explode
With all this Drag that's tonight
Bring extra tissues
--A. Wainner

BYU Singles
Can be compared to lepers
But that is unfair.
--Z. Pendleton

I'm back in Utah.
Not looking forward to snow.
Texas is 80.
--T. White

I caved. Lips!

2011-03-04T01:24:00.003-07:00

You know what? I need to feel vindicated. So I found a picture of this girl's lips. (Don't ask. I'm all sorts of crazy--I mean crazy intelligent.) So please tell me I'm not too weird to have complimented her on her full, well-shapen lips. Some people pay good money for this:

Embarrassing Moment of the Day

2011-03-04T00:24:00.007-07:00

My life is one big embarrassing moment after the next. I like to tell myself that I do it for the sake of comedy, but sometimes things just slip out of my mouth. Perhaps I just have so much practice saying ridiculous things for the sake of a laugh that when it's time to just be normal, I'm already conditioned to be ridiculous.

Moving on...

I went to Smith's with some friends tonight to grab some "stay awake medicine." (Don't tell the honor code office.)

As we were passing the feminine products aisles, along comes my ex-boyfriend Bryce pushing a shopping cart with some beautiful brunette by his side. I did the obligatory "Hey!" in an "Oh this is so not awkward to run into you, and I'm thrilled to see you again in such a non-confrontational environment" sort of way.

Then came the, "Has it been long enough that we just say hi or keep walking or are we going to stop and pretend to catch up" moment? He stopped his cart. I stopped my entourage, and so as to not throw off the rhythm of the moment, I placed my right hand up in the air to give him a high five. As our hands were moving toward each other I realized he was actually trying to give me a hug. We ended up looking like one of those renaissance promenade dancers that take two steps in, touch each other's hand, and then take two steps back, only with a jealous female onlooker and a really awkward back story.

Bryce then asked, "So what is this? Are we going to hug? Are we at that point?" So then he made me feel like I was the foolish one to respect his hugging space near a girl who, for all I knew, was his new wife. So I went in for a hug, screaming at my brain to not employ my usual manipulative techniques to intimidate the chick next to him and to get him to flirt with me back. I succeeded at that--and pretty much failed at life after that.

So then Bryce and I made small talk for a few minutes, and I looked over at her to cue him to introduce us. He did. I reached over the cart to shake her hand and asked to repeat her name because clearly it wasn't the embarrassing, bed pan-esque name that Bryce had said. (To protect her identity, I will not reveal her name). But yes, she repeated her name, that allowed me to easily intimidate and destroy her. But I didn't. After my quizzical look she just said, "Oh bed pan, as in short for "Betty Panda." Ok... My mind was trying so hard to focus on the positive that I found the most obvious positive thing about this girl--her lips.

So I did it. Right after, "Nice to meet you," I said, "You have really pretty lips." Oops. That sounds creepy. You better qualify that statement. "I mean, it could just be your lipstick," nope, not the right qualifier, though she did put on a lot of lipstick and it's kind of running off her lips at the top "or it could just be the result of good genes" Oh my gosh, I'm pretty sure I just gave her enough evidence for a restraining order. Look away. Just look away. I resumed conversation with Bryce and then got the heck out of there.

I could go more into detail, but it's just too hard to swallow. Anyway, the moral of this story is... Oh who knows? I obviously don't have the answers.

And because I like posts with pictures but I didn't want poor Bryce (or Bed Pan) to suffer, I will just include a picture of a T-shirt design contest Bryce and I entered once upon a time (and should've won, by the way).

Update: Click here for a picture of infamous Lipgate 2011!

Happy Valentine's Day!!

2011-02-14T00:02:00.001-07:00

My freshman year in college, my roommate Ashley and I posted pictures of our guy friends on our dorm room door and asked passersby to vote for the hottest man for V-day. We got quite a big turnout. We had more than 200 votes and we had somewhere in the ballpark of 30 pictures.

Well this Valentine's Day you only get one. See this Valentine's Day (and the days leading up to it) I've been thinking a lot about love and this person repeatedly entered my mind:

My Mommy.
(I vowed I'd call her Mommy for the rest of my life. But when I got to high school and noticed it wasn't cool, I forced myself to say "Mom." I swear it took a year to transition.)

I've been thinking about my mom not only because of how much I love her but also because she was the first person to teach me love: what is love, how to love, who to love, and everything in between.

My mom met my dad, got engaged, got married, gave birth to a special needs child, and was pregnant with her second all before she turned twenty. She wasn't planning on becoming a mother so young, but she was willing to give up her dreams and educational ambitions because of love. She loved my dad and she loved my oldest sister, Jenny, so she started her longest-running profession: stay-at-home mother and homemaker.

For awhile, my mom took a lot of criticism for bearing any more children after having a special needs child, particularly from her mother-in-law. I could only imagine how discouraging that type of criticism would be to a 20-year old young newlywed mother. Why did she have more kids? I don't know everything, but I know that she loved and adored children. She loved family and wanted to add to hers.

I am so grateful she did because, as child number 6, I would've had no chance at all of having her be my wonderful mother had she given up at 1...or 5 for that matter.

I can relay countless expressions of love from my mom, but a better tribute would be one that people would actually read. So I'll list the highlights.

My mom encouraged me in my talents
When I was 10, I was playing a bunch of Disney songs by ear. I wanted to take piano lessons so badly. My mom saw this determination and paid for me to take private lessons from that time until I graduated high school. When I was 11, the orchestra teachers came to my elementary school to recruit string players. I was fascinated by the violin. I asked my mother if I could play it. She not only allowed me to but also paid for private lessons up until high school as well.

My mom encouraged me in my non-talents.
I was a natural performer from birth. I needed to be the center of attention. While perhaps some in my family tried to squash that need, my mom nourished it. For example, I would come up with synchronized swimming routines in the pool as a kid (by myself, mind you) or interpretive dances to REO Speedwagon songs. She would watch and also encourage others in the family to watch.

She never left me. Ever.
Maybe this isn't healthy now, but I was sure grateful at the time. When I was sick, my mom would always feed me crackers and sprite, stay by my bedside, and rub my hair until I fell asleep. That's a long time! And she would do this all the time. Occasionally she would snuggle me in my bed. And I got very accustomed to afternoon cuddle naps with my mom in her bed (in Kindergarten we only had half-days so it was just me and her at home).

I am a grown woman, and still to this day when I get pretty aggressively ill, the first words out of my mouth are a mindless groan, "Mo-oomm......"

Emotionally, she is wonder woman.
My mom is the most in-touch with her emotions as anyone else in this world. It was always OK to cry in front of her. It was always OK to feel anger, hurt, elation, giddiness, or any emotion. She never judged me for it or made me feel like it was unacceptable. She was just there for me in whatever capacity I needed her. She still is.

She is so feminine and domestic.
My mom is such an example of what a Mormon housewife should be. She has lots of kids, she can cook, she can paint, she can sing, she can play the piano, she can sew. Oh man, and does she ever sew well. I can't even sew a button.

The fact is, among all the things she has done for me, the best of all is that she loved me unconditionally, and in turn, I know how to love.

And I love her!

Happy Valentine's Day, Mommy!

The Hard Choices

2011-02-08T21:53:00.000-07:00

Given the choice between eating either almost ripe strawberries for the rest of my life or very ripe avocados, I would choose the avocados.

Peer Pressure is the new black

2011-01-31T13:08:00.000-07:00

Accomplishment of the day: Cartwheel on the balance beam.

Brought to you by: Male peer pressure.

Here's the thing. I've been working on a handstand on the high beam forever and ever. I still can't manage to get it perpendicular, but I'm not too worried about it because most my classmates are still only attempting it on the low beam (typical law student--measuring my own accomplishments by how well others are doing).

I should start by saying that after the women's gymnastics class at 9, there is a men's gymnastics class at 10. Our coach lets a few girls stay after and practice as long as it doesn't interfere with the dudes. Well dudes don't do the balance beam so I had it all to myself. Ok, so....

I got bored trying and I asked the coach what other skills we would be required to finally complete on the balance beam by the end of the semester. Cartwheel? Optional. An advanced skill that we could include in our routine but didn't have to.

So I decided that, to mix it up, I would alternate trying a cartwheel on the low beam and trying a handstand on the high beam. (PS--the low beam is not a competitive apparatus; it's just a practice apparatus that helps you feel more comfortable doing the skills on the regular beam). So I started doing cartwheels on the low beam. It's an accomplishment to not only attempt a cartwheel, but to actually land it and not fall off when on the low beam. So after completing it a couple times and getting pretty emphatic cheers from a couple dudes who were around and telling me there's no way they could do it, I decided to head over to the high beam and try a handstand. But the boys who were just watching me and cheering me on said, "Oh man, you're going to try it up there. That's crazy awesome." Or something like that. They thought I was going to do a cartwheel up there.

So I couldn't disappoint the boys, right? So I got up on the scary high beam--not even able to do a 45 degree angle half-A handstand, and I attempted a cartwheel. Nope. Fell off. Tried again. Did it and landed it! Tried again. Nailed it again!

Not to brag or anything, but I'm just kind of proud of myself for being able to do a hard skill that we won't even need by the end of the semester. Yeah whatever, I just need something to overcompensate for my incompetency on the uneven bars.

In other news, I completed probably about 10 standing back handsprings (haven't been able to do those in almost ten years) and one round-off back handspring on the floor. Pretty happy about that, but now I've got killer bruises and my back is totally jacked.

Success.

Anyone want to hold my hand?

2011-01-20T06:26:00.001-07:00

My hand...after I finally conquered one uneven bar yesterday:

Celebrate the small things

2011-01-19T12:58:00.000-07:00

I am proud of myself for a few very small accomplishments. If I record my progress, I think it will make me try harder and reach my goals faster.

First, I completed three back hip circles without any spotter or assistance in my gymnastics class. They look easier than they really are, I promise you. Most of the girls cannot do it in the class yet. Of the ones that can, many have to still use spotters. Here's what one looks like: Back hip circle

(By the way, my hands and upper quads took quite the beating from repeatedly practicing this. I will upload pictures of my jacked-up hands later; I'll spare you the pictures of my bruised up legs.)

Second, I completed and landed a level handstand on the low beam and had the guts to repeatedly attempt it on the high beam. This is what it's supposed to look like: Handstand.

Last, we watched video clips of each member of the class running. One of BYU's running coaches said I could be an Olympic middle distance runner based on the way I run. I know that won't ever be true, but the good news is 1) I have really good form to run and run fast, and 2) I don't need to buy special running shoes to get good speed, distance, or form. It's built in to my genetics. Thanks Mom and Dad.

18 Strong

2011-01-18T20:24:00.000-07:00

I decided to give up sweets--THIS ENTIRE YEAR.

I'm 18 days clean and counting.

It's super insane. I'm not really a sweets-a-holic; I'm just a social sweet-eater. But when you live in Utah, every social event highlights something sweet (seriously Mormons, couldn't we have made "wrapping everything in bacon" our treat of choice?), so I made this a New Year's Resolution so I would consciously avoid sweets.

Can I just tell you how hard this is? I mean, it's pretty hard. Definitely a lot harder than I thought it would be. I have a heightened sense of awareness when I see a picture of a cupcake---or a lamp that looks like a cupcake. Or a chocolate store--or a person whose sweater is "chocolate" brown. Mmmmmm. Yum.

I attempt to satisfy this hunger by: eating cereal, eating peanut butter, and eating lots and lots of carbs. It doesn't help too much, but it at least makes my body not feel so bad. After eating cake, I'd feel so gross. After eating 2 1/2 bowls of frosted flakes, I feel like I can still party.

I just wanted to tell you all that. I saw a cupcake today and asked myself the question Professor Wardle so thoughtfully asked in a book once: "What's the Harm?"

FINAL THOUGHT: Not to get all churchy and stuff, but I think the biggest motivation to keep going is not just because I "promised myself" I'd do it, but because going without sweets gives me the same benefits as fasting. By going without something for a prolonged amount of time, it helps you focus on things that really matter and draw you closer to other better things in your life. You know, like frosted flakes.

WSJ and The Onion...Separated at Birth

2011-01-05T16:46:00.000-07:00

Don't get me wrong--I love the Wall Street Journal more than any other newspaper in the world. But today's "most popular stories" looked more like headlines from The Onion than from a reputable news source.

FIGHT OR FLIGHT

2011-01-05T00:35:00.000-07:00

This year, I have clocked more hours on the phone with the staff of continental.com (including that annoying automated message that repeatedly boasts of the airline's "congress of chefs and sommeliers) than with any and all of my family members combined--and I have 25 family members. Why? Because of their ridiculous change fees. It costs $50 - $150 to change my flight to any other flight but the ones I want. The policy sounds pretty reasonable, but the practical application is almost entirely useless...kind of like reading someone his Miranda rights.

I wish I weren't so pleasant with customer service people. I'm pretty sure if I had complained that would've given me what I wanted. Instead, here am I with a midnight flight to Salt Lake and missing the BEST CLASS IN THE UNIVERSE:: Intro to Music Business.

On that note, I am willing to pay $30 and dinner to anyone in Utah who is willing to video record the lecture for me. (I already have a volunteer who will tape record it for free, but I'd benefit much more from a video recording, even a really shoddy one on an iPhone or camera. Any takers?

YEAR IN REVUE

2011-01-03T20:40:00.001-07:00

Sure it's a little late but get over it. I still need to have my postmortum with one of the most interesting years of my life: 2010. You were good to me.

Highlights

* I officially became a groupie and went to more concerts this year than I ever have in other years combined. Among my greatest groupie feats was getting invited back to the hotel with the keyboardist of a national band (don't worry--We only went into the lobby) and having the keyboardist of another band prank call me.

* I underwent two elective procedures on a complete whim--one of which involved a clamp and flaps, the other of which involved a doctor pushing my head back against a kitchen wall and coming at me with a needle while his toddler son ate Little Caesar's pizza three feet away.

* I narrowly escaped kidnapping from a Mexican drug cartel on the U.S./Mexico border during the 4th of July when I went out for a seven-mile jog that went horribly, horribly wrong.

* I biked 10 miles to my boyfriend's house, only to find that another girl had taken my place, the kind of stuff Simon and Garfunkel warned me about. But they didn't warn me that the same girl would start a very public verbal slaughtering of me before leaving the festivities. One of the better memories of 2010, indeed. :)

* I pulled off the greatest April Fool's Day in the world, leading my parents to believe I was marrying an unemployed young boy with no direction, leading a guy I went on a date with to believe I was actually married when we went out, and leading both my ex-boyfriend and my roommate to believe that someone had stolen their cars...leading me to never want to top that April Fool's Day.

* I attended the only university other than BYU: University of Utah, which ended up being a refreshing change of scenery and allowed me to meet some really cool people and learn what it's like to have a separation of church and books.

* I lost one of the best friends I've had in the most epic way possible, while also losing some of the best friends I've ever had in pretty much the same way I've lost them since I was five. The latter wasn't shocking and is pretty much written into the emotional budget plan; the other was so unexpected but so entertaining that it was totally worth it. I think.

* I dated the youngest boy I've ever dated and also took the moral high ground by refusing to kiss him until he went on, and completed, his mission.

* I negotiated my rent for the first time and won big time!

* I completed my first 5K, and my recorded time was 23 minutes and something seconds.

* PROM FIASCO: Probably the most memorable part of my year and quite possibly the best fodder for the next teen angst/drama box office HIT but not quite distant enough to explain via an open, online portal.

2010, I loved you so. How in the world could 2011 compete?

Future... what the heck do you want from me????

UP AGAIN! Dreaming of Tusks?

2010-12-22T04:27:00.000-07:00

What is with me? It's not like I went to Thailand for a week and am jetlagged. No, no it's not that. But for some reason, for the past week, I have been going to sleep some time in the morning (5, 6, or 7 am) at times that I normally was waking up. No amount of dietary, exercise, or sleep change has been able to effect it yet. I think I will try not sleeping all day this morning and see if I'm tired enough to sleep through the night tomorrow. (One night, I successfully got to bed around 10pm, but then woke up helplessly at 1 a.m. I couldn't get back to bed until around 7 a.m.)

Anyone have any good suggestions to get over non-jetlag jetlag?

In other news, I've decided that the best soundtrack to an insomniac's night is Fleetwood Mac on shuffle. That group can wail. I mean, I was never their number one fan, but for some reason, the chemicals being released in my brain at this time of night mix well with "Tusk," "Everywhere," and "Sara." Look them up. It's goooood (in a 500-days-of-summer-elevator-scene kind of way).

No Tartar Sauce

2010-12-20T03:32:00.000-07:00

Okay people, I am home for Christmas, and I just cooked myself up some delicious fish. I wanted to enjoy it with some tartar sauce--something I thought would be standard fare in any refrigerator. I always love coming home because of the amount of food constantly available at the house. But,

Turns out at my house we have
* more than five bottles of fresh salsa bottles written entirely in Spanish,
* a couple bottles of Italian sauces written exclusively in Italian,
* a jar of capers (which admittedly I snacked on during my hunt),
* a couple jars of green olives,
* three bottles of horseradish sauce,
* a couple containers of lime and lemon juice, among other "normal" condiments.

No Tartar sauce.

What is this, the end of days?

Selling Furniture/Moving Outta This Place!

2010-11-19T02:07:00.000-07:00

I will accept the best offer for these items. I also have a floral print couch and a green papasan chair, both of which are not photographed, for free. Let me know!

7' Vintage couch with chair: $35 (comes with the large, matching chair below)

Large, comfortable matching chair (comes with set)

Tweed Chair $15

Dresser Drawers--Pottery Barn Style SOLD

Wood Desk (comes with a matching, cushioned chair not pictured) SOLD

Buffet $10

Book shelf: SOLD

Coffee Table SOLD

My Ex-s Have The Best Ex-s

2010-11-16T15:23:00.000-07:00

Okay so I'm not going into details because it's too long and I don't have time. But what's been on my mind recently are all the girls I've met recently who have dated my ex-boyfriends. Can I just tell you...I count myself lucky to have been attractive to the same guys who get to date these wonderful ladies.

Too often I think women get really catty and jealous when confronted with their arch enemies. As one of my ex's can attest (as he signed onto my Facebook account and stalked my chat conversations long after we broke up), my favorite people in the world are not naturally inclined to be the females that used to date my favorite boys. But why not?

I mean, seriously. We at least have one thing in common--that we broke up with the guy. On top of that, the guy was attracted to something in us that probably made us similar. In each instance, I've bumped into my ex-boyfriend's ex's and have LOVED them. Seriously, they are the most remarkable women.

One of them remembered my name, what I was studying, and my future goals from meeting me a year ago when she dated my ex. Another one of them invited me to her wedding group on Facebook. Another one called me her friend and suggested that we are so much alike. In every single case where I've actually gotten to know them, I am blown away.

Who are my heroes? My ex-boyfriends' ex-girlfriends. Hands down.

PURE LOVE

2010-08-19T21:40:00.000-06:00

For the purposes of an update, I'm now a band manager. I officially manage 5 different Provo bands from 3 different genres. And I go to law school. And I am a recruiter for BYU. And I work for the state's largest (and really only)entertainment law firm. And I seriously, seriously love my life. Like seriously. And just when I thought it could not get any better, I opened my email and found this:

href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPLMwI1wabE&feature=player_embedded">

Outta Control

2010-07-08T09:16:00.000-06:00

Another deep post. Here goes...

In high school was the first time I learned that I had offended someone close to me. Our coach noticed that another Mormon girl didn't attend early morning seminary, so she was always able to make practice on time. He asked me about it and said, "Aren't all good Mormons supposed to go to seminary?" I answered, "No. The only thing is probably that you have a little harder time getting into BYU if you don't."

Somehow my coach thought it would be funny to go up to this other Mormon girl (who was in my ward and my Laurel's class with me) and say, "Sara said you're not a good Mormon because you don't attend seminary."

You can see how 1) this was completely not what I said, and 2) how that would be completely offensive to the person to whom it was directed. After the damage was done, I tried to repair it by explaining to my coach that that wasn't a funny joke and that he needed to apologize to this girl and let her know that I actually did not say that.

Too late. You know those moments when you just get wedged into your head one idea and hardly anything will change your mind on it? Yeah, I think this is what happened to this girl. She never talked to me again. Ok I take that back. I think I saw her at the temple once right before my mission and she was there for a wedding. I think I got a "Hello."

So this event had a huge, huge impact on my life. See, for weeks, months, and arguably YEARS later, I tried to repair this damage that I felt like I didn't really cause. I saw the hurt, and I saw how valid she was in thinking that it emanated from me. I seriously tried everything: service, cute notes, going through mutual friends, treats, everything. For the first time in my life, I felt like a total utter failure.

But I learned one thing about relationships: SOME THINGS ARE OUT OF YOUR CONTROL. And when you come across one of those situations, there's really a two-step process: 1) You do everything in your power at the time to remedy the situation, and 2) You let it go and respect their agency.

I have been repeatedly reminded of this principle over and over again the last three month with many different people. Perhaps that shows my weakness--that I cannot solve my own problems effectively. But you know what? It is what it is. I am me, and I am trying my best and sometimes my best isn't good enough for people.

So for all you whom I have offended, again and again for the rest of my life and forever, I am deeply sorry and would gladly do anything else to try to repair it if I actually knew what more would help. And the fact that I have stopped trying is a sign that I feel there's nothing more I can do and I am on to step 2: I just have to let it go.

I'll wait forever for the other person to use their agency to forgive, forget, and let go of their feelings and be cool with me. But I think I should give them their space and allow them to do that at their own pace and not try to force them to be cool with it.

Seriously, this has been one of the hardest things to learn. I really do love people--I love all people. I guess I just haven't mastered perfectly how to show my love individually. Any ideas or insight is always welcome.

Love, Sara

When To Hold and When To Fold

2010-06-11T02:21:00.000-06:00

How much worth is it to invest everything in a friendship, at the expense of other relationships, money, sleep, and principles?

Doesn't Jesus say that it's the second great commandment--to love our neighbors as ourselves? So how can I best fulfill this commandment? Any answers? Hypothetically speaking of course.

Flirting with admissions...Texas style

2010-03-27T22:00:00.000-06:00

So apparently I got busy last week (go figure) and wasn't able to finish--or even continue--my series on past boyfriends. For another day and time, folks. Until then, I'll tell you that I've been thinking a lot lately about when I applied for college. I just got a job as a high school recruiter for BYU, and I'm remembering all I went through to apply and select a school.

One thing I was particularly proud of was my admission essay. I remembered advice given to me by my senior English teacher, Ms. Brown, when she told us to make our essays creative and memorable. I took that advice very seriously. So for my 200-word essay on how I prepared to come to BYU, this is what I wrote:

Here in Texas, everything is big; molehills are mountains, drizzles are floods. If something must happen, it happens in extremes. And so it happened that this southern belle prepared herself extremely for the demands of higher education.

Mere participation in fine arts escalated into a mountain when I made competitive region orchestra and region drama. I also received the highest honors in speech and violin for various tournaments.

Serving as laurel president and leader in stake youth council, I elevated my Y-Mount into Mount Everest. I composed music for beehives to play in church. I went with missionaries to help activate youth in a ward. Writing the stake's New Beginnings program added snow to my summit. Remembering I must build others' mountains as well, I devoted last summer to tutoring children in math and reading.

My academics were no Carolina creek, either. I drenched the embankments of a high school education with participation in AP classes and National Honor Society. This, combined with my leadership roles in school and service organizations kept my Rio Grande flowing.

I have filled my Texas taco with the meat of the gospel and the flavorings of arts and rigorous academics. Doesn't it look tasty?

What do you think? I'm still so proud of it, although it's extremely juvenile. Looking back, it seems risky that I would write something so flippant. But I got in, so...

Dating Lesson Number 1

2010-03-22T10:00:00.000-06:00

You know when they say that before you die, you see your life flash before your eyes? Lately my mind has been flooded by the lessons learned from past relationships. You could say it’s flashing before my eyes. Hopefully that’s a sign that my single life is soon to be over.

But in honor of my recent flashbacks, and due to the fact that I found out some friends need their frequent rule19 fix, I’m going to start blogging more diligently again. I will be blogging about the lessons learned from past relationships. I feel like I've changed and become better with each one. Hopefully that's true.

Now as I speak about past relationships, I don’t want anyone to feel defamed. So some names have been changed where appropriate. When it’s not appropriate (such as the guy will never read this blog, I kind of want to use actual names; you know…to keep it real.) I also want to make it entertaining so I'm going to diligently reflect on each relationship and compare my relationship with a character in popular culture, mostly from TV or movies.

So here we go with installment one: first boyfriend, Sam.

With Sam, I was April from Parks and Recreation.

Why April? Because she likes to create drama. She dates a boy who is sometimes gay, who also has a boyfriend who's always gay. If things weren't so weird, she probably wouldn't be involved in this relationship.

So Dating Lesson Number One: Relationships are more fun when you can have them without drama.

I met Sam in my high school video tech class. He was the class clown. He was also extremely smart. So right when I first started dating, I knew generally what I was attracted to (funny genius boys). But what I loved most about Sam was that he was Jewish. I thought it would create a stir. I was the stereotypical "Mormon girl" in my school and I thought it would create a buzz if we started dating. We started dating around Christmas time (or Hanukkah I guess) when school was almost out so we didn't have time for people to see that we were dating. When we came back from break, I tried to spread it around in a very controversial way--spread my own salacious rumor about my own relationship.

Unfortunately for Sam it didn't work. People kind of thought it was weird but when they'd ask, "Isn't that against your religion?" I didn't want people to get false doctrine so I used the opportunity to talk about temple marriage but also tell me it's fine to date whomever. No drama.

So then I tried to create drama using my power position in the school. For 90-minutes every other day, I was an administrative assistant in the principal's office. Frequently I would use the pink hall passes (I was able to get people out of class with them to come to the principal's office) to get Sam out of class. We'd find an empty room and just chill for the period. After once getting caught from my speech teacher (who held in his hand the power to revoke me from the traveling team), I decided the drama wasn't worth it. Little Sammy and I only lasted a month.

He's now got himself a hot Jewish girlfriend, a bachelor's from University of Texas and a stable job at Microsoft in Seattle.

Stay tuned tomorrow when we examine Brandon, who filled my desire to date a jock...and subsequently helped me learn why I hate that.

Oh Danny Boy

2010-03-15T18:30:00.001-06:00

Most people have bad things to say about their ex-boyfriends/girlfriends. For Daniel, I tried and tried and tried to think of something bad. I got nothing.

Daniel's a first-year law student at the top of his class at Arizona State. We met when I was a first-year law student at BYU and he was applying to schools. Same ward. His minor was my undergrad major. His political ideals matched my dads. We're both Texans. We're both outspoken. He's close to--or one of my--or I hope he doesn't read this blog and think I'm sappy or lame for saying this because I'm supposed to be unemotional --maybe my best guy friend. Just super chill. A great influence. All around great guy.

This is Daniel seducing a goat, the day after my birthday (2008); the day before we got together...officially?

He's in town this week for spring break. If this were Facebook, I would "like" this.

Anal Girl?

2010-03-10T07:48:00.000-07:00

Call me crazy, but is it weird for me to find a text on my boyfriend's phone to another girl telling her that he loves her?

Sure, yeah. Maybe he loves her platonically.

But is it weird if he hasn't ever told me that he loves me? And he's known both of us just as long?

You know, I guess he's right when he tells me girls just like to create lots of drama.

The Sickest Week Ever Part 2

2010-02-25T16:24:00.001-07:00

It all started out innocently enough. My sister and I bought tickets to the Fun. concert about a month ago and had been patiently awaiting their San Antonio show. I flew in for the occasion because, let's face it: seeing them once just isn't enough.

So that morning, I went running, played some music, and did many things to get my mind off the auditory awesomeness that would shortly ensue. At one point, I decided the “I Love Fun” shirt I painted a week before was just too plain. So I sifted through every lyric of all their songs to find the perfect one to immortalize on my chest. Somehow when I was painting it, the phrase “shake me down” did not seem as inappropriate as when I flaunted it in a notoriously sketchy part of town late at night. So two hours later, with the help of my niece and nephew, I had myself a shirt I could never wear again—not even to the gym.

It was time to go, so Emily and I hopped in the car and bopped to Fun. music the entire car ride. Because I had met the band’s keyboardist when they came through Salt Lake City, I asked Emily what she thought if I gave the keyboardist my phone number. Emily and I joked that somehow rock stars who get chicks’ numbers at concerts are not expecting what I’m wanting—slurping a Sonic slush and playing a good game of cosmic bowling. So I thought, “Well why don’t I just make my intentions clear?” I began to write this note on scrap paper my sister had available:

The concert was great, if by great I mean being the only two twenty-somethings in a sweaty pen of hormonal high schoolers. Next time I might just stay home and watch them on Austin City Limits. As we started to leave, though, we asked a venue employee to take our picture. When it became apparent that the band wasn’t coming out to sign autographs, we asked this employee if he had backstage access. He said yes. I told him about my encounter with the keyboardist in Salt Lake and how I had written him a note. The employee agreed to deliver my note. But because this kid was pushing sixteen and my note was somewhat juvenile, I doubted it would ever get passed the chuckles of his group of friends.

Oh well. I went to bed. But then things got a little crazy. The next day as I was taking a nap, I got a call from a Chicago number. I normally don’t answer if I don’t know who’s calling me but somehow I suspected who the caller was. It was the keyboardist! Yep, he had called.

But of course nothing came of it. It turns out he’s more of a Wendy’s frosty kind of guy.

P.S.--This was my feeble attempt to cover up the double meaning screaming off my shirt.

I'm still waiting for my Sonic-loving stud.

The Sickest Week Ever Part 1

2010-02-22T17:25:00.001-07:00

I'm using sick in the California sense. (I will never forget the first time my surf-loving bleach-blond Californian partner in advertising class used "sick" to describe our project. I was offended. I should've been proud.)

But back to the real news. Man has the past week been killer. The best yet. It started Tuesday, February 9 when I woke up at 5 a.m. with great anticipation of the Fun. concert that was to happen that night. Sure, a handful of my friends canceled on me at the last minute, but that didn't matter. I could rock out with Nate-dogg by myself. Well my friend Sister Peterson and her roommate graced me with their presence once I was up in Salt Lake. Although her roommate was there to see Jack's Mannequin (6 out of 10 stars), they came so I didn't look like an idiot 26-year-old law student head banging in the middle of pre-pubescent teenagers in midriffs who had been dropped off by their mothers.

Funny moments of this night:

1. I hadn't been to In the Venue since before my mission so I was a little rusty on directions. I turned a corner and saw a line of really sketchy characters. Thinking it was the line to get in, I immediately parked and prayed I wouldn't get hurt. When I got there, I realized they were all homeless people waiting in line at a shelter. I walked another three blocks to the actual venue. And like a scared little girl, found two girls walking to the concert and started chatting them up so I didn't have to walk alone.

2. This was the first time I had seen Sister Peterson since her mission. She was a missionary in my parents ward when I returned home from my mission. Later she was the missionary in the singles ward that I attended once I decided to interact with the opposite sex. So the only interaction Sister Peterson andIi had had was to and from gospel lessons. Sure, we may have gotten side tracked talking about Band of Horses and other super great indie bands, but still...seeing Sister Peterson in real clothes and me screaming "I'm not a prophet but I'm here to profit" at the top of my lungs made me about 25 percent self-conscious.

3. The whole crowd was getting anxious between the opening act (Vedera) and Fun. I had a sneaky feeling a lot of people were there to see Fun., so I decided to take matters into my own hands. I was going to start a chant. I tapped the 15-year old boy in front of me and asked who he and his five other high school friends were here to see. "We're here to see Fun.," they answered." I then told them that I was going to start a chant to encourage Fun. up on the stage faster.

"At the count of three, yell 'we want fun.' One, two, three." We all started to chant. It was a little uncomfortable at first. I hate leading without followers, but as soon as I saw that it wasn't going to be a total bust I continued onward. Shortly thereafter, guess who appeared on stage? Yes. Fun. Fun, right?

I'm a horrible photographer but even I can tell that this picture is super sweet. Look, I got Nate singing--twice--in the same picture. Yes, I posted this picture.

Here's Sister Peterson, her roommate, and me all having a great time at the concerto.

But the most fun of the evening came when I went to get an autograph. I went over and saw the keyboardist from Fun and other weirdos I didn't recognize signing all the teeny bopper paraphernalia. I waited awhile because I figured I was too old, cool, and smart to wait in a line. But when I saw the line wasn't dying down, I just jumped right up to the front and said, "Hey Andrew." The keyboardist looked at me as if to find a long lost friend. What stood in front of him? The woman of his dreams:

We chatted for a bit, I complimented him on his left-handedness, and he cheekily signed my shoe:

Yep. He drew a cat. And when I put down my shoe, he said, "No wait! I need to add whiskers!" You can whisker me any day, Andrew.

Fast forward a few days...

The J. Reuben Clark Law Society took place in Salt Lake this year so I took advantage. Afterward I hiked Ensign Peak with a favorite mission companion, Kim-Dizzle. We somehow forgot that it was February and it had been snowing so the pathway up to the peak was inches deep in delicious mudcakes. By the time we got down, our shoes had more foliage on them than the mountain. This is my beautiful mud shoe companion and me at the summit:

The next day I jumped plane to Texas where my sisters had planned a Girl's Day Out at the lakehouse in honor of my arrival (and singledom) for Valentine's Day. Some of the pictures are for our eyes only but others are too cute to leave to just Payne-girl knowledge. Here are some of my favs.

Homemade lunch in the ivy-kissed gazebo. That's right. I called it that.

What are we, in high school?

The obligatory jumping picture...always a crowd pleaser. (We love: My glasses, Emily's mouse ears, Sherrie's expression, and Maria's hand.)

Sherrie wanted this one, but then called me out on stealing the show. Typical. I can't help my good genes.

Then Maria made these trans fat-dipped, delicious, artery-clogging desserts that we gobbled up pretty quickly.

Thank you, treasure island, for showing us such a good time. Love, Sherrie, Emily, Maria, and Sara. (We missed you Tina, Jenny, and Mom.)

And that was just the first half. It would take an hour to read the amazingness of this week, so I decided to separate them into two different blog posts. Wait patiently for round two, where Andrew Dost from Fun (the band) and I have a DTR!!!

Jealousness and Nate Ruess lovin'

2010-02-21T19:09:00.001-07:00

My ex-boyfriend is so cool. I'm kind of obsessed with male vocalists with really unique voices--in particular Nate Ruess. Nate Ruess started his music career in Arizona as a member of the successful band The Format. When the band broke up two years ago, Nate formed the band Fun. and is on tour right now with Jack's Mannequin (I swear pictures are forthcoming. Give me some time to recover.)

But Nate thinks he's too cool for school right now so he doesn't come out to take pictures with fans or sign autographs. But when he was an up-and-coming band member from Arizona, my little future ex-boyfriend, Bryce, was a little head banging high schooler in Arizona and got to meet him. Jealous. He sent it to me once, so I'm publishing it here and living vicariously through Bryce:

Bryce is the second from left, Nate is to his right.

Bryce and I went tubing in the Provo river this summer and my tube flipped over. I have naturally crazy wavy hair so when it dried (and the only warm thing I had in the car was Bryce's argyle sweater), Bryce told me I looked like Nate. What do you think?

But the best is that The Format had a professional photographer taking pictures at one of their Arizona concerts when Bryce was in high school (and I was probably on my mission or something) and Bryce got in the picture. Interestingly enough, another guy named Max, who whom Bryce did not yet know, got in the picture as well. Max and Bryce ended up being roommates at BYU after their missions and both realized they were photographed at the same concert together. Here it is:

Max is the one with the "what, you know I'm hot" look on his face in the front. Bryce is the 6 foot 4 under-age hottie way in the back right with his hand up in, what we as Texans refer to as the 'hook 'em horns sign.

Oh and p.s., if you want your ears to be stroked with the silky smooth sounds of Nate, touch here: The Format--Swans
(I'm so obsessed with this song that I work out to this. No joke. Running 8-minute miles to a love ballad.)

Belatedy

2010-02-17T08:37:00.000-07:00

Umm. So I definitely have not posted in awhile. I'd like to say that the last couple weeks have been really busy, but the truth is that they've just been extremely fun. I haven't had any desire to post because I've had way better things to do. Like... well I shouldn't get into it. Pictures to follow.

But because this post is lame, I created a new word: belatedy. It's a noun describing the state I am in when writing this post so late.

Also can we please just talk about mornings after crazy crazy nights? As a mormon, how am I able to garner sympathy for the head and stomach aches that ensue after a night of (clean) partying? I can not, in good conscience, blame it on a hangover; people will get the wrong idea. But if I just say I stayed up late last night, people don't feel any special credit is due. I need to come up with a word for this feeling. You know what I'm talking about.

I'm feeling it right now. And the only thing so far to make me feel better is drinking Citracel and eating peanut butter on crackers for breakfast.

Different Personalities

2010-01-30T18:38:00.000-07:00

Friday I received an email from the Dean of Admissions. He asked if we could meet that morning. Immediately I thought the worst and knew I was being kicked out of law school. I prepared my speech, "It was all a big misunderstanding."

Instead, he offered me a job as a research assistant.

I am in charge of new media communications for newly admitted students to encourage them to matriculate at BYU. In a nutshell, I will be getting paid to constantly check Facebook.

But here's the cool part. I sent a mass text to my family telling them the good news. It was fun to see everyone's responses based on their own personalities and their own relationship to me:

Tina (sister closest in age): Sweet. Congratulations.
Damon (brother-in-law): Holy #*$%. That's great. Will this impact your summer plans?**
(after telling him I'd still be home for the summer): Congrats. That's awesome.
Sherrie (oldest sister): Congrats!
Mom: congratulations! As always, i am so proud of you.
Dad: of the law school?
(after answering first questions): Tell him you already have a job.
(after answering Dad's next concern): When do you work and how much do you get paid?
(after answering his third concern): Which is?
(after answering last concern): Hope you have time.

No texts from my sister Emily or brother Chris. Why? Because Chris is an "as-necessary" man. If he doesn't need to respond he won't. I think it's implied he's proud of me. :) And Emily only checks her phone every several hours so by the time she found out, Damon was probably home and told her he congratulated me for the both of them.

Love my fam.

**For the record, Damon doesn't swear but he pretends like he does. He literally used those characters on the text, not a swear word.

Life lesson of the day

2010-01-27T15:47:00.000-07:00

NEVER.

EVER.

SHOWER

...after slicing jalapenos.

No matter how much hand-washing you do after fondling those hot little devils, you will never rid yourself of the spicy sensation.

guaranteed.

They call me a player...a team player

2010-01-19T15:30:00.000-07:00

I just took a test to find out my mediation style. It's for this course I am taking to become a court-certified mediator for the state of Utah. Here are the results, if you even care:

Your Results
Demand (6)
Convince (15)
Negotiate (7)
Team Work (10)
Support (4)
Avoid (3)

Interpreting Scores
~ The highest possible in each category is 15.
~ None are inferior; all can be appropriate depending upon factors.
~ The goal is to be able to use all of the styles at the appropriate time
~ Highest score - most comfortable style.
~ Lowest score - least natural.
~ Even scores means you are even balanced in the different styles.
~ Difference of only one or two points - easy to have second style be a ready back up.
~ Difference of two or more - tendency to hold on to style longer even when the style is not working.

The Deming Conflict Styles
The most important aspect to understand about the conflict styles is that they are not permanent. Each style has positive and negative aspects. The goal is to learn traits from each style and be able to easily move from one style to the other depending on the situation.

Convincers - I, We, You
Convince - Attempting to persuade someone to accept your point of view.
Communication Traits - Smooth talkers, charming, and charismatic. Usually very likable people and have good leadership skills. Tend to exaggerate the positive. Love to debate. TIP: Need to work on listening skills because they usually bring up their own experience and think about what they are going to say next instead of listening. Need to make sure and follow through with commitments.

Positive Aspects:
~ Usually get their way (Ummm... I'm pretty sure I already told you that in #12 here.)
~ Used extensively in the business world
~ Does not use force, but uses logic, reasoning, and charm
Negative Aspects:
~ When there is no trust, convincing will not work
~ Others may feel cheated
Professions that use the style:
~ Car Salesman, telemarketer, politician, and advertiser
Best when:
~ The idea is so important to you that you don’t have any flexibility
~ You want to convince others of your ideas
Works best with:
~ Convincers

Team Workers - We, You, I
Team Workers - Collaborating and using creativity to make everyone satisfied.
Communication Traits - Creative, considerate, good listeners and talkers. Usually focuses on the positive. Very social and amicable. They are only completely happy if others are happy too. TIP: Need to realize that not everyone is a team player and they need skills in other areas so they do not get taken advantage of.
Positive Aspects:
~ Creative
~ Makes everyone satisfied by combining options
~ Knows how to listen and express feelings
Negative Aspects:
~ May get taken advantage of, especially in business world.
~ Does not work unless everyone wants to be involved, fair, and honest.
~ Takes a lot of time.
Professions that use the style:
~ Mediators, human resource, communication department, or company management
Best when:
~ The relationship is important to you
~ Working with other teamworkers
~ Have plenty of time
Works best with:
~ Team Workers

Oops.

2010-01-16T11:29:00.000-07:00

New Year's Resolutions are being flushed down the toilet already.

New Rules.

2010-01-07T15:42:00.000-07:00

OK, so I caved. I made more New Year's Resolutions. Because if I don't keep the one from my previous post(fingers crossed) I would feel like such a failure. So please help me keep these rules of 2010:

* 100 percent visiting teaching
* Lose 35 pounds by summer
* Apply to one firm every day until my Texas trip (Feb. 13)
* Travel

See Daniel? Most of my goals do NOT involve kissing. :)

Two Down, 363 to go

2010-01-03T00:26:00.000-07:00

I have always been extremely goal oriented. At the beginning of each new year I usually concoct fifteen goals that fit neatly into four little categories, all bent at improving who I am. I never reach them all. This year, though, I only made one goal. So far, I've almost already broken that one.

That goal is to kiss no more than two boys this year.

The goal really is to only kiss people who I could see myself marrying but I have to quantify it or else my lawyer brain will find some justification why I "might eventually" feel like I want to marry some boy.

I held out strong today even though it was extremely difficult. I will feel like such a winner if this goal is kept.

Copycat

2010-01-02T19:22:00.000-07:00

A few days ago I blogged about a date where I discovered the antics I pull when dating. Tonight I went on a date with a guy who, through clear and convincing evidence, I'm pretty sure read the last blog entry and conformed his date around it. At first I was weirded out but some of the things he was doing. But then I thought, "Wait a minute...aren't these sort of a version of what I wrote on my blog?" The gig was up. So, "Peter," if/when you read this, I'm sorry I am broadcasting our date publicly. But I guess that's what you get for virtually stalking me.

When I got home and explained the date to my roommate, she said, "You can't outplay the player...especially using her own game. That's right, Katie. That's right. Here's how the date went down, using my own bullet points.

1. I plan every move.

He admitted to me that for weeks and weeks and weeks before the date he did extensive research on me. He quizzed boys I had previously dated; he asked people in the ward who had known me for awhile about me; he asked random law connections that I don't even know that well. And I'm beginning to think he also read through this blog, too.

2. I rely heavily on looks. It makes or break the rest of my relationship with a guy.

First, he spared no potential moment of silence by exclaiming how "beautiful" and how "sexy" he thinks I am.

Second, you may remember my last blog post where I emphasized the guy's height as the most attractive thing. Guess what he chose to focus on: his height. He's 6' 4" and he just kept going off about he attractive that is to women. Coincidence? I think not.

3. I am not myself early on--I parrot a boy's personality until about date three.

Early on, like within the first five minutes, "Peter" told me how much he liked me. From then on when I would try to give him a reason not to be attracted to me, he would only follow up with a reason why he's the exact same way. At one point I said I was completely heartless and it's hard for me to really connect to people. He followed: "Oh yeah, me too! I know I seem like a nice guy, but some people get on my nerves a lot." He was serious.

4. I decide early if I'm going to like a boy.

Like I said, within the first five minutes he had told me how much he liked me. By the end of the date he had explained to me all my wonderful characteristics that attracted him to me (mind you, this is our first date so this is all information he gathered beforehand), including my perfect height, impeccable taste in ice cream, and good manners. As he drove me home, he said, "I think I'm already starting to fall in love with you. It's gonna be hard for you to stop me."

5. I put myself in jeopardy to maximize my date's potential.

My last post talked about how I didn't wear a jacket to see if he'd offer his. Well this date I wore a jacket, but he kept asking if I was cold. Later, I noticed he dressed in several layers. Perhaps expecting to share his jacket??

6. I heavily use jealousy to expedite their crush on me.

He once talked about all the dates he was going on and how his roommates always complained about not getting any dates. Other than that, maybe he should've milked the jealousy card a little more. He did ask if I there was anyone, besides himself, that I was romantically interested in. To which I responded, "I love boys. I have a crush on every boy." To which I should've responded, "Well, you've read my blog. You should know the answer to that."

7. I am a detective.

Ummm...it should be obvious by now.

8. I touch boys. And I laugh lovingly at them.

Last post I emphasized how touching is good but overdoing it is not. He overdid it: way too early and out of context. Within five minutes of the date, he had his arm around me uncomfortably as we walked down the streets of Provo. All I could think about was the guy who had left my house not five minutes before with whom I have a history. I was hoping he wouldn't see. But then again I thought it might help with the jealousy points. Anyway, this arm around me stuff happened intermittently throughout the night. Overdone. Weird.

9. I play major reverse psychology. I manipudate the situation when I feel like the boy is getting the upper edge.

This is a step that only true players know how to execute. He probably was confused when he read this on my post because he very apparently did not follow it. In fact, if he had flooded the date with this, he may actually have a shot at a return date. But instead, I had the upper hand the entire night and didn't even have to work for it.

10. I find opportunities to let them shine and then I compliment them on it.

Everything. Everything I did, including when I kept kicking snow on him, was spectacular--He loved it. It made me ill.

Okay so maybe I made a big deal about the guy from the last post liking the same band and the same dessert as me, but I didn't tell him those things and say we'd make a great couple. I only observed them. This guy took "we like the same ice cream" and "we both don't like long plane rides" to mean that we'd make a great couple.

11. I surgically plant in their heads the idea that this is not the last time we will see each other.

This was more than surgery; it was my strapped on a gurney being punctured in every possible vein. At every inopportune moment, Mr. Peter talked about "the next time we go out" to the point where he even said that by date four I would be madly in love with him. Hmmmmm. On the doorstep at the end of the night he asked when we could go out again. I insisted he called me later. He insisted we schedule it right then and there. He didn't realize he had delivered the upper hand on a silver platter to me and that I wouldn't budge. He relented and said he'd call next week and take me to dinner. Cool.

12. I win. Always.

Nope.

Story NOT to be continued....

On another note: Mr. Boy from below, let's call him Skyler, texted me today. We're going out some time next week. Fingers crossed. :)

A peephole into Sara's dating mind

2009-12-30T13:35:00.000-07:00

Normally I don't write posts about boys and my encounters with them on the very off chance that they're somewhat like me and will stalk their way to my blog, read what I think about them, and never talk to me again. But today I'm taking my chances because I'm beyond a reasonable doubt sure last night's dude will never find this blog.

Last night I learned a lot about how I date and manipulate. I'll call it, manipudate. It's kind of funny because for some reason last night brought out all the qualities I have when I am trying to "catch" the opposite sex.

So last night four of us went to the Spurs game. I invited this boy who is the oldest son (whom I had never met prior to this week) of good family friends from my home ward. I thought it would b a nice gesture. He accepted. I picked him up at a bowling alley on my way down to the AT&T Center. Here's how the evening unfolded corresponding with the thing I learned about myself:

1. I plan every move.

I got out of the car. I mulled over whether or not to call him. He had texted me his number but I didn't text back because I did not want to seem too eager. So there I was, standing in the rain, wondering if he'll see me and come out or if I should go in looking for him. Would that look desperate too? Maybe I should just call him. I call him. Almost the second he answers we meet in the entrance. Dang! I shouldn't have called. Oh well, lesson learned. I turn off my phone for the rest of the night.

2. I rely heavily on looks. It makes or break the rest of my relationship with a guy.

There he stood in the entrance of the bowling alley, perfectly lit by the neon bug-infested signs above and behind him. He's 6'6". I immediately want to marry him. Assuming he eats meat and is averagely intelligent, I want him. See, tallness to me is like New Moon's Jacob to 40-year old moms. I totally swoon. The taller the better. this boy was BEST! I wondered if it was too soon to ask him to marry me.

3. I am not myself early on--I parrot a boy's personality until about date three.

Because it was extremely slick and I was driving a behemoth Yukon through downtown San Antonio, I asked if anyone wanted to drive instead. He volunteered. I like to sit really close to the steering wheel so I warned him that he'll have to majorly adjust the seat when he gets in. "Why, cuz I'm huge?" he asked. No, I thought, it's because I sit freakishly close to the steering wheel. "Yes, cuz you are HUUUUU-GE," I said.

4. I decide early if I'm going to like a boy.

The drive down to the AT&T Center wasn't too long, maybe half an hour. But in that time, I determined that this boy was perfect for me. My view could've been skewed because of his height (it seriously melts me until I can't concentrate on anything else), but I noticed he was conversational but not overly chatty; he was pleasant but not contrived; he was himself. He wasn't trying to be someone else. Then he names off his favorite bands. Number one: DEATH CAB. I almost died. That is my favorite band! Add to that the fact that when I mentioned one of my favorite up and coming bands "Fun" he said, "Oh yeah, he used to be the lead singer for The Format." Again, my heart skipped a beat and I feared death. Was this boy too good to be true? The cherry on top is the fact that he's from Texas, that he wants to be a high school history teacher (secret fantasy of mine), and that he's a self-proclaimed introvert, but not because he's shy--just because he does better in smaller groups. SWEET! Am I in love, I ask?

5. I put myself in jeopardy to maximize my date's potential.

As we stepped out into the frigid, rainy musk and walked the quarter mile to the entrance, I bit my lip and took it. I deliberately left my coat at home so that I could test if he would offer his (who does that??). He didn't even notice on the way in. (After the game, though, he did say "Where is your jacket, girl?" I said something and then we both went on merry way--me without a jacket.)

6. I heavily use jealousy to my expedite their crush on me.

He sat down first. I sat down next to him on that row. Linda's guy friend (we'll call him "Logan") sat next to me, then Linda sat at the end. With Logan next to me, I chatted him up, touched his arm for effect when he made a funny comment, and swapped stories about the Air Force (Logan is a doctor in the Air Force.) I occasionally moved my interest back to my boy to balance out the evening because I know jealousy should only be used in moderation. Several times as I looked back, however, the little skeez was dinking around on his iphone...

7. I am a detective.

This boy isn't dinking around...he's texting a girl. I take note of her first and last name for later use and then remember she's the girl who invited him over for New Year's. I straight up ask him about his "friend" and he tells me she's a Spurs fan. I plan on when the precise time is to ask him if this girl is more than a friend. I weight the pros and cons of each: right now so it's fresh? During a lull in the game so I don't sound too information-hungry now? In the car with Linda there? In the car alone with him? I decide on later in the game. I get an unexpected, unwelcome answer.

8. I touch boys. And I laugh lovingly at them.

Guys love two things: The love to think they're funny and they love when girls touch them. So when I like a boy, I make sure to do both simultaneously. I made sure to calculate each one to maximize each one's effectiveness. But not too much. If you overdo, it's weird. And I didn't overdo it. It was brilliant.

9. I play major reverse psychology. I manipudate the situation when I feel like the boy is getting the upper edge.

This boy wasn't a Spurs fan but he was a big basketball fan (He's 6'6", guys. Haven't you been reading?) For most of the game as I complimented him on his sense of humor, cool iphone, and his amazing height, I had to counter act so he knew I was in control of the situation. So...when I picked the winning color "dot" on the jumbo tron, I rubbed it in his face. When the Spurs would make a killer play I would slam that in his face. When he tried to bash on the Spurs, I playfully reminded him that his precious Jazz have never won a championship.

10. I find opportunities to let them shine and then I compliment them on it.

He decided we should leave early in light of the fact that the Spurs were winning by about 20 points. I did NOT want to leave until the end. What did I tell him? "Oh man, that's such a great idea." We walked out to the parking lot. We were walking for awhile and I said, "Are we lost?" He confidently responded that he has a good sense of direction and that he knew where we were going. I offered calculated encouragement: "That's great. I trust you." We drove back to the bowling alley to drop Linda off at her car. We proceeded home together in my car--just us. We decided to get shakes. EZ's or Sonic? He decidedly said Sonic and then straight up told me how good he was at making decisions. "Oh man, I love that. It is such a good quality," I assured him. Boys eat that stuff up.

Oh and just in case you were wondering, he wanted the banana cream pie shake at Sonic. Happens to be my favorite. This man could be missing his front teeth and partially retarded and I might still fall in love with him. His height and taste in music put him up there on the scale, but his taste in Sonic shakes made me fall in love. Literally. He may just be the guy version of me. I don't know yet.

11. I surgically plant in their heads the idea that this is not the last time we will see each other.

As we chatted about our favorite bands, and life back in Provo (he was leaving for P-town the next day), I talked about Las Vegas. (My friends and I are planning an explosively awesome trip to Vegas next semester). After he shared his lukewarm feelings about Sin City, I described our exciting plans and he said that sounds fun. Then I said, "Well if your Vegas trip had been like that would you have liked it more?" He said yes, so I invited him to come along. He accepted. BAM!

12. I win. Always.

Once I like a boy, they're mine. This one's got a potential girl, but she's just that. Potential. I have her name and very finely tuned detective skills. I already know quite a bit about her and she seems like a nice girl. I'm sure she'll make a great girlfriend...to someone else.

Story to be continued....

Memory Lane

2009-12-07T02:13:00.000-07:00

Up late, studying for finals, listening to iTunes.

All of a sudden, my mind is taken back to some pretty great memories. Isn't it funny how your brain associates certain people with certain songs? Here are some songs that remind me of boyfriends of the past, starting with boyfriend number one: Sam from high school. The songs probably explain all too much about the relationship :)

Sam: Dr. Dre and Snoop--Next Episode

Brandon: Dixie Chicks--Cowboy Take Me Away

Michael: G-Love and Special Sauce--Baby's Got Sauce

Dave: Outkast--Hey Ya!

Craig: Ummm...when we first started dating we thought it would be funny to have this song as "our song," so that if/when we broke up, we wouldn't have to listen to sappy old love songs. It worked.

Eric: Anything by REM or Cat Stevens but particularly this song. When he let me control the radio, usually Britney, Alanis, or Ben. Living in NYC, this one sang me to sleep when Eric wasn't there, which was always.
- REM: Man on the Moon
- Ben Kweller: Falling

Then...I started dating younger men:

Adam: PussyCat Dolls--When I Grow Up

William: Chris Rice--So Much For My Sad Song

Daniel: Kanye West--Heartless

Bryce: There are so many-probably because it was so recent but I don't think I will ever listen to this song without thinking of Bryce, nor will I ever listen to this band without thinking about our plans to travel to India. (I promise it's worth it to click. These are rad bands/songs).
- Joshua Radin and Schuyler Fisk--Paperweight
- Jump, Little Children--Mexico

Tyler: Hahahaha. None come to mind because I always dominate our music-listening sessions with this beautiful song: Fun--The Gambler

I sure love music. I mean, yeah I love boys, but I really love music. It has never let me down.

$$$ at Work

2009-11-30T15:28:00.000-07:00

Six things I am grateful for:

Friday, Dec. 4: Judicial Commission Paper Due
Tuesday, Dec. 8: Legislation Final
Wednesday, Dec. 9: Family Law Final
Friday, Dec. 11: Business Associations Final
Monday, Dec. 14: Evidence Final
Wednesday, Dec. 16: Wills and Estates Final

Because without these finals, my tuition money would mean nothing. If you don't know the bitter, you cannot know the sweet. If I don't experience finals, I cannot get my J.D.

Sara Elizabeth Payne, future Esq.

How in the World Do I Choose?

2009-11-26T10:38:00.000-07:00

I love Thanksgiving. There are so many things flooding my head for which I am grateful. For the purposes of this blog, though, I've narrowed it down to the top ten things I have been grateful for particularly this year.

10 Love—I am grateful that I fell in love this year. I am grateful for everything that love taught me. I’m grateful for the Lord helping me to have enough faith to step into the dark and give love a shot. I did. It was worth it. I cannot hardly wait to do it again.

9 Food—I love food, and I’m grateful I always had enough of it to eat. Especially Dibs and sushi.

8 Music—It heals the soul, it spices up life, it induces, I think, the strongest emotions that humans have. Music is like my best friend. Weird? Probably.

The Gambler

7 Warmth—Heat is always good. Except that one time in July, driving through Blythe, California with no air conditioning. Other than that, heat is great for tans, swimming, sports, cuddling, hot chocolate, and scrambled eggs. It also means I’m probably in Texas or close to it…or close to someone I love.

(Blythe, California. Dying. Melting ice cubes from the cooler on to our 200-degree bodies)

6 Health—I have overwhelmingly good health. I hope it stays that way. When I got crazy swine flu and bronchitis at the same time, it made me realize how wonderful good health is…and for that, a body. This year, I’m probably more aware of how much a blessing it is to have a body: all the things you can do with it. Big responsibility.

5 Meg Gallagher—Ok, so maybe our friendship is oddly defined (BFA?) and maybe we don’t spend all our time together, and maybe we have friends that we are closer to, but somehow Meg is the one who actually gets me in moments I need it the most. She is the only person I can talk to about certain things. It’s sad to think that soon the chapter in my life with her in it will soon be coming to a close.

4 Law School—As much as it seems like it’s been a burden, I love law school. I frequently walk the halls of the school and stand in awe of the fact that I am blessed to attend this school. I am so grateful for education, for learning a marketable skill, and learning alongside some of the greatest, most accomplished, and fun people I will probably ever meet.

3 Struggles—I am extremely grateful for the trials I have had to endure this year because they have made me stronger, softer, and more understanding. My dad told me during a particularly hard time on my mission: “We will always have trials. You will have this trial, Sara. The choice you have to make now is if you will allow it to help you grow.”

2 My strong family—They have helped me get through a lot of hard times, and this year in particular, I felt their love more than ever. I think I’m becoming more homesick the older I get.

1 Jesus Christ—For offering hope in everything I do, everything I am, everything I hope to become.

Reflections on Incoming Calls

2009-11-24T16:39:00.000-07:00

Incoming calls are like mail... ninety-nine percent of the time they're fun to get, even if you won't readily admit it. As long as a parcel of mail has my name on it, I get excited. So too, as long as the person on the other line knows me personally, I'm thrilled.

One day I got a call from CoxSmith, my dream law firm, telling me that I had been waitlisted for their summer program. "How thoughtful of them!" I mused. The fact that they decided to call instead of simply sending a letter made me temporarily forget that I would not be employed by them this summer.

Another time (actually many times) I got phone calls from my former boss at six a.m. on Monday mornings. She, as is frequent, had a little too much to drink the night before and needed me to open the store for her. Even though she was waking me up from my sweet slumber and effectively canceling my awesome plans for that day, I still found some sort of excitement in the fact that I got a phone call. Weird.

Well, a few weeks ago, I received a phone call from someone with no negative undertones. It was from Katie Bryan, my newly married former mission companion friend. She was in town for the weekend. Let me just say that Katie and I were companions in probably my most difficult transfer on the mission. We both had our own things to deal with and we're both really neurotic people. I wasn't sure we would be friends after the mission.

To my surprise, we actually make REALLY great friends. I love that girl. She thinks like me. She gets me. She has a fantastic sense of humor. And, she is smoking hot, but married, so I can use her as bait for attractive men.

Well, we went and got pedicures at the mall and then I took her out to Carrabba's for her birthday. I am so thankful for great friends who know you so well and who are willing to love you anyway.

Later that night, i got a call from this guy:

who I ended up going on a Dibs run with. (If you don't know Dibs, you must try them. Except if you shop at Smith's, don't try the Mint Chocolate ones because they are always out and they're my favorite.)

When we were leaving the store, who did we see checking out? That's right...druggy Brooke. You wouldn't know it from her Rolling Stones t-shirt and her pill-popping propensity, but Brooke is actually in law school. She sits next to me in business associations, and she's actually pretty smart. But because she's really smart, she really knows how to party well in Provo. Party on, Brooke-meister.

By the end of the night, I had partaken of so much Good-ness, that I looked like this:

Verbal Failures

2009-11-18T00:03:00.000-07:00

In elementary school I got my folder signed for speaking too loudly and too often. My defense to the teacher was that my talking habits were a product of my genetics and that she couldn't punish me for a trait I couldn't control.

I wish my genetics kicked in today. Why is it that in the moments you most need to speak, the words just don't seem to come? Tonight I meant to say, "I will do anything for you, including loving you forever." What came out was, "You still owe me two hundred bucks."

I am not yet sure what hurts more: rejection, or wondering what might have been.

On the bright side, I'm two hundred dollars richer now.

26 Candles

2009-10-30T13:08:00.000-06:00

Birthday wishes coming true:

1) Not contracting swine flu

2) Lots of traffic up to SLC = Mega bonding time with Kari, mission connection

3) Super cool temple session--went through for someone from Boston. TMOL.

4) Dating a football player. Or at least wearing his disgusting helmet.

Photos from Seven Days of Summer

2009-10-30T12:55:00.001-06:00

Temple Love.

Watching The Paper Chase with Women's Law Forum

Impromptu Date...free food, free entertainment, free boys

At some sandwich place which now escapes my memory with all my companions from Boston (except Laub) after one of the most spiritual and defining moments of my life. I love you sisters!!!

Seven Days of Summer- Days 2-6

2009-10-10T12:15:00.000-06:00

Okay, so I was going to wait to update until I actually had pictures, but it's been a long time coming, so I'll just list them now and put up pictures later.

Tuesday: Attended the temple

Wednesday: Played volleyball with friends

Thursday: Watched a dorky movie about law

Friday: Sang hymns with cute boys :)

Saturday: Drank a tall mug of hot chocolate while reading a good book.

Life can be so wonderful.

Seven Days of Summer-Day 1

2009-10-06T11:36:00.000-06:00

Monday’s “30 minutes or more” of Summer, took about 90 minutes and I was thrilled. I took my best friend, Meg, to my favorite Italian place (that is comfortably becoming my least favorite because of how much I eat there), Carrabba’s. We had delicious food, deep conversations, and funny photo ops.

We took the above photo, but then I thought the light was not adequately portraying how I looked that night. So I took the initiative:

I like candid shots, so Meg and I decided to pose...candidly.

But really, we just love each other. Meg and I have known each other, for better or for worse, for the past seven years. There is nothing I can't tell her; there is nothing she can't tell me. She has been like a sister to me while all my family is grown up and in Texas. Last night, we talked about how much we've learned, how much we've changed, and how much fun we've had since those early days of 2002. It is so great to grow up, and it's great to look back and realize the Lord's hand in everything. I know the Lord's hand was in it when Meg and I met.

Favorite Memories With Meg:
- Del Taco runs
- Avril Night at Pizza Pipeline
- Sleeping in a twin bed
-Listening to "The Luckiest" by Ben Folds on repeat
-Coming to visit me at my mission farewell
-Playing kickball with the missionaries
-Delivering a clandestine letter late at night (wink, wink)
-Laughing together
-Crying together
-Her constant "meows" via g-chat
I really could go on forever. And I hope we do.

Seven Days of Summer

2009-10-06T10:06:00.001-06:00

Although Autumn is by far my favorite season, right now Utah is not being very Autumn-like. It feels more like the prelude to Winter. So I would like to channel the virtues of summer a bit. This week is the law school's Fall Break, which means that we get a break from going to class while we scurry around trying to digest the information that was force-fed down our throats the last two months. But it also means we get to sleep in as late as we want, stay out as late as we'd like, and do whatever with our days without feeling guilty. If I don't study for a class tomorrow, I'll be just fine in the long run.

So, this week I will be bringing a little "30 minutes or more" moment to my life. Why did I reference "summer" in this blog? It's because summer brings sunshine, warmth, and sunbeams. That is what this "30 minutes or more" moment will be for me--just a 30 minute ray of sunshine in my day. So no matter how stressful, busy, crazy, depressing, or utter failure my days become, I will always have my summer moment to know that life is beautiful.

Yesterday was a good start, but most of yesterday was phenomenal, so it's hard to choose. I will choose to highlight the moment, though, that I will probably remember most in later years. So stay tuned. Once I have the photos loaded, I will post.

Aren't you just so anxious to find out?

(PS-I find joy in the simplest things...like watching a flowing river and crunching fall leaves with my boots, so don't expect daily trips to Disney World during this experiment. :)

Persistence

2009-09-18T02:22:00.001-06:00

Hello there. I listened to the Prophet speak at Devotional on Tuesday. His summary of Heber J. Grant's life really impacted me. A lot. That man embodied persistence and diligence. I will now be embarking on a systematic review of his life so I can closely have a role model to follow in my quest for perfection. What a marvelous man. I loved these quotes, and then found some more to add. I hope you love them as much as I do:

Persist in all those things which are good and noble.
-President Monson, remember President Grant's legacy

Some men give up their designs when they have almost reached the goal; While others, on the contrary, obtain a victory by exerting, at the last moment, more vigorous efforts than ever before. - Herodotus

That which we persist in doing becomes easier - not that the nature of the task has changed, but our ability to do has increased. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

All our losses will be made up if we are faithful. -Joseph Smith (movie)

Road Trips

2009-09-16T14:30:00.001-06:00

I was talking to a friend last night who made it very clear that road trips with a loved one somehow indicates that two people are destined to be together. I guess I am an anomaly. It worked for my sister.

The genius of the indigo girls

2009-09-16T14:19:00.000-06:00

During the time of which I speak it was hard to turn the other cheek
To the blows of insecurity
Feeding the cancer of my intellect the blood of love soon neglected
Lay dying in the strength of its impurity
Meanwhile our friends we thought were so together
They've all gone and left each other in search of fairer weather
And we sit here in our storm and drink a toast
To the slim chance of love's recovery.

There I am in younger days, star gazing,
Painting picture perfect maps of how my life and love would be
Not counting the unmarked paths of misdirection
My compass, faith in love's perfection
I missed ten million miles of road I should have seen

Meanwhile our friends we thought were so together
Left each other one by one in search of fairer weather
And we sit here in our storm and drink a toast
To the slim chance of love's recovery.
Rain soaked and voice choked like silent screaming in a dream

I search for our absolute distinction
Not content to bow and bent
To the whims of culture that swoop like vultures
Eating us away, eating us away
Eating us away to our extinction
Oh how I wish I were a trinity, so if I lost a part of me
I'd still have two of the same to live

But nobody gets a lifetime rehearsal, as specks of dust we're universal
To let this love survive would be the greatest gift we could give
Tell all the friends who think they're so together
That these are ghosts and mirages, these thoughts of fairer weather
Though it's storming out I feel safe within the arms of love's discovery

Day One

2009-08-17T12:32:00.001-06:00

Anyone see 500 Days of Summer? Well, today is my Day One, and because art imitates life and I will feel robbed if my life doesn't turn out like a movie, I am expecting today to be GREAT!! Today should bring lots of suitors, lots of chance meetings, lots of professional success, and lots of destiny determining my life.

Nevertheless, the last 143 days have been beautiful. Simply beautiful. Almost like a fairytale. And I will always remember them with a grateful heart and tender feelings...maybe a few tears.

Ring Shopping

2009-08-10T18:32:00.000-06:00

Muffin made of stud

2009-08-10T18:30:00.001-06:00

Fun of mountainous proportions

2009-07-26T21:45:00.000-06:00

Sundance got a double dose of Sara recently. My good buds Will and Dan wanted to get together and take dates up to Sundance's outdoor movie nights. Without too much discretion or thought, I said yes. I took Carruth.

Will took Steph.

Dan? Well...

He took some chick that I had never met, and whom I will probably never meet again, knowing him. I don't remember her name. Soak up her image, folks. This will probably be her one and only cameo on my blog.

Well, it ended up being the wrong night. There was no movie. no people. no lights. nothing. So we just laid on blankets, freezing, talking about conspiracies and the inhabitants on other planets. Carruth and I left early because we only took three blankets and apparently up in the mountains you have to have an entire Bed Bath and Beyond store in order to stay warm.

[REDACTED]

Girl's Night

2009-07-26T21:31:00.001-06:00

I am so blessed with spectacular girl friends. Most of them in Provo are old roommates or wardies. I'm so glad I got to reconnect with Katie after the mission and be her roommate. I look forward to another great semester as little Kate Spade's roommate.

Katie and I had a girl's night last week complete with soothing pedicures, a brief shopping trip, chocolate, and an all-out splurge at Carrabba's. YUM!!!

I hope to spend more time soon with my wonderful girls. I am so glad my best friend Meg and I have still been able to stay friends all these years even though we are so different in so many ways. She is so amazing and helps me through all the problems in my life. The Lord uses her to talk to me, for sure. I'm glad she came to my mission farewell. I am so blessed that we got to be in the MTC at the same time. I'm glad we wrote our entire missions, and I'm glad to live just two blocks away and that she doesn't totally hate me for not spending as much time with her as she deserves. She truly is a wonderful influence in my life.

I thought of Meg this week when we ran into this car...figuratively speaking:

Women talk women. tuesday nights at the flower basket. love it.

Fond Fond Memories

2009-07-22T22:30:00.001-06:00

I was driving down 9th East, and I had to stop at the light just south of the temple. The temple was on my left, the MTC was on my right. I watched as a group of young-looking boys walked in front of my car. My eyes started to well up as I thought about how I felt some three years ago when I was in their shoes. These boys have no idea what is about to happen to them, I thought. No matter how prepared a person is, the mission will totally rock that person's world and change his/her life forever.

It changed mine. I prepared as much as humanly possible. I wanted to give back in service to the Lord for all he had blessed me with. Then the mission happened and I realized that the opportunity to serve a mission was the most wonderful blessing the Lord could ever bestow on me. It changed my life. These boys are going out into the world full of hope, knowledge, plans, and a testimony. They will come back men and will forever be changed. I hope I can do my mission justice by still claiming to be a representative of Christ in my words and actions even though my mission is done.

Brie and Peanut Butter

2009-07-20T01:19:00.000-06:00

So...I have a confession to make. A week or two ago, I was eating one of my favorite foods--peanut butter--and we pulled out some Brie cheese (one of my favorite cheese) from the fridge. One thing led to another, and Bryce and I were sitting on the couch dipping the cheese into the peanut butter and eating it like that. Gross, I know. Bryce thought it was totally appropriate to tell that story about two minutes after I met the family. Really great. Anyway, now that they think I'm not that strange I decided to let them in on our little world of fun. We had a picnic Friday at Kiwanis Park and we introduced them to the brie and peanut butter phenomenon.

For those of you who are curious as to how one eats this delectable delicacy, I will show you. You first take the wheel of cheese, cut them into small triangles, and then tear a small portion of that triangle off. Then you dip it into peanut butter, and eat away. Sometimes, depending on what you're in to, you can suck off the peanut butter from the cheese and then dip the same piece of cheese back in the peanut butter. That's the method of choice for this boy:

I'm actually not sure if anyone, but Macy, tried our wonderful cuisine. But we definitely finished half the wheel of brie. Don't even worry.

It's cool, though. Marci suggested eating one of her favorite, interesting dishes: peanut butter and pickle sandwiches. I think I can live with eating peanut butter and brie in front of someone who likes the PB and pickle combination.

All in all, the park was fun. We had J-dawgs, chips, and diet DP. We rushed out of there for Bryce's physics class and then I went back to work where I researched more on the USA PATRIOT Act and how BYU must comply with it. Here's an interesting piece of trivia: Did you know that the Patriot Act isn't just a clever name? It's actually just a really long acronym for Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act passed only a couple months after Sept. 11. Very controversial, but it has not been overturned or repealed. yet.

This graphic is from The Onion, my preferred news source:

This summer is going great. I am on a pretty tight schedule; I have lots to do, but I also have lots of fun. I have wonderful, good friends to spend time with, and I'm really loving the fact that once I'm done with work, I'm done. I don't need to study or stress about tests, stare decisis, case holdings, or exceptions to rules. Although I love law school and I actually miss my law friends and going to class and learning, I can tell that when I graduate, I won't be too terribly disappointed. I think it will be nice to have a law job and to get on with life.

Keeping up with the Johnsons

2009-07-14T08:06:00.000-06:00

Bryce and I went down to Arizona just last week, but if you tell the Johnson family to come visit any time, they really will come! Marci, Reed, Macy, and Brooks graced us with their presence this week. We went to Park City and bummed around: ate lunch, rode the Alpine slide, watched skiiers jump into a pool of water, rode a few times around on the gondola, and got lost several thousand times in the hotel. All in all, I'd say it was a pretty successful trip.

This is our ascent up to the alpine slide- the first time I had ever been on a ski lift and Bryce took advantage of the situation. Luckily I only freaked out when the camera wasn't looking.

haha. nervous laughter while Bryce pretends to push me off the lift.

this is my ridiculous face and this is bryce's "that. was. AWESOME!" face

Then on to the Alpine slide. I felt like the mother up there. When you get Brooks and Bryce together, you need to make sure there are no sharp, fast, or poisonous objects around. Otherwise be prepared for large hospital bills. The boys were disappointed when the ride didn't totally work them over. Luckily, Macy didn't take after her brothers. She sensitive and cool and took the ride at a reasonable pace...screaming the entire way down.

They made me go in the back because they said i would be the slowest. I may be twice their age, but that just means twice the fun, right? : )

We went back to the hotel and rode this thing:

It was so much fun, and it was free. Maybe it was fun BECAUSE it was free. In any case, I'm seriously tempted to just drive up to Park City every week so I can ride this fun little machine. I know I'm a dork.

Oh funny story...so everyone told Bryce's parents how I was flipping out on the ski lift up to the Alpine slide. So the rest of the time, their parents were deeply concerned about me and how I felt when we got up on large ledges or rode ANYTHING. The first thing they'd ask when we got off-each time- was how I felt. It was so funny. Now it's the running joke in the family that I'm scared of heights. SO not true.

I'm only scared of heights when I'm swinging on an unenclosed surface with a man next to me pretending to push me off.

This man:

...with socks and birkenstocks:

Life is good.

Gone Fishin'

2009-07-12T21:56:00.000-06:00

So I thought I was an avid fisher woman...until my friend Will invited me to go fishing yesterday morning and I remembered I haven't gone fishing since high school. I used to go all the time at our ranch in Smiley, Texas, but life has a way of catching up with you and stuff. Well, here are pictures of our wonderful/fruitless excursion placing baited poles in Deer Creek Reservoir and leaving with one less hook, four less weights, and $15 less in Will's pocket after I completed two tasks he dared me to do. I won't tell you what, but I will never do them again. Sick!

Trying to look like I'm trying to fish

This is Will rigging his pole so it looks like he's getting a bite. In reality, the only bite he will get all day is the big one he got at Zupa's for lunch (See below.)

Will's a really good actor, acting like he's about to pull a fish out of the water.

I'm not too impressed.

Will and I went to Zupa's afterward and I almost got him (a vegetarian) to order the turkey spinach and avocado panini. He opted for a grilled cheese, but ended up taking a significant bite (the right hand side) out of my turkey sandwich. This is the first bite of meat he's had since going vegetarian in February. I feel so special that I was the one that got him to do it!!!

Oh by the way...the fam came into town on Friday and we picnicked with Bryce. I'll have to put up pictures later because they're all on Sherrie's computer.

Love me Long Time

2009-07-09T18:12:00.001-06:00

I have not posted in awhile. Things are changing. I just finished my internship in Texas where I worked for the State Attorney General catching all the bag guys trying to screw Texas consumers. Don't mess with Texas.

Now, I'm working for BYU's office of general counsel making sure that we have all our ducks in order. Lots of fun.

Coolest news by far, however, is this little friend I've picked up on the way. He's not too little. He's 6' 4''. I love the tall ones. We have fun. We laugh a lot. We travel. We stay up late. We wake up early. We stare at each other. We read books and talk for hours about politics. We've known each other a few short months, but I can tell this is the start of a beautiful friendship.

He's my Rule 19 indispensable party.

Rule 19 party indeed. New PILF Veep

2009-03-24T15:23:00.001-06:00

So, I thought I would be running unopposed in the most recent Student Bar Association Election, so I did not plan any campaigning, nor did I write up a legitimate statement about myself. Instead, I am pitted against a professional advertising manager who wants to be the PR coordinator. This is was my "persuasive argument" for voting for me:

Election Haiku

Vote for Sara Payne
Her brains, beauty, charm and grace
Will be used next year

When she does PR
For all law shenanigans
Rule 19 Party

Yeah, I know. Compelling. Anyway, as a consolation, I attended the PILF meeting today with a co-worker so we could snag some free pizza. It ended up being a meeting to elect next year's board. I'm not even a PILF member, but I got suckered into running for VP of booksales...and won. Oops. I am not vice-president elect by default and the position I truly wanted may elude me. Cruel, cruel irony.

Brown Noser

2009-03-20T23:43:00.000-06:00

My overachieving nephew won a city-wide health contest and got to fly with the Spurs to Washington, DC to watch a game and eat dinner with Bruce Bowen. Not too shabby. All he had to do is write an essay about how he makes healthy food choices. When you read it, you can't help but think that he is either 1) the world's biggest schmoozer, or 2) a future lawyer--and a darn good one at that. Below is the essay in its entirety. Oh and by the way, Tyler, I want to be just like your dad, too, when I grow up.

Here it is, in all its literary glory:

Describe how healthy Iifestyte choices have influenced your life.

"I try to make healthy lifestyle choices every day. I know that making healthy lifestyle choices is good for me because it will help me liver longer and happier. My dad played basketball in college, and I want to play college basketball like he did, so I eat healthy foods and avoid unhealthy foods. I also exercise regularly and get plenty of sleep at night.

I eat three meals a day. This assures I will get all the nutrients I need to be strong and grow tall. I also choose to eat fruits and vegetables over junk food. In our family we often eat grapes, carrots and broccoli as snacks. This helps me not get fat. It also helps me have a lot of energy for sports. I also eat whole wheat bread. My mom makes it for us to eat. This helps me get all the nutrients from whole grains. My parents never buy soda, so I almost never drink it. I choose to drink water instead, because it doesn't have sugar and other chemicals that are not good for my body.

I exercise regularly in order to be healthy. I play competitive soccer in the spring and fall. We practice three hours per week, I also play competitive basketball in the winter and summer where we practice 2 1/2 hours per week. I also run 5K's with my mom whenever I can. I beat many of the adults and all of the kids. Regular exercise helps me perform better in sports.
Another healthy choice that I make is to play outside. Instead of watching TV or playing video games, I play baseball or football in the backyard with my friends or brother. One final healthy lifestyle choice I make is to go to bed early and get up early. This helps me not be so tired so I can think clearly at school and learn everything I need to learn.

I try to make healthy lifestyle choices every day. I have learned to enjoy the things that are good for me. I eat healthy foods and avoid bad junk food. I also exercise regularly and get plenty of rest. I do these things because it helps me feel happy now and throughout my life. It will also help me be healthier and live longer. Hopefully, some day I will get to play college basketball like my dad did."

If this isn't the beginning of a good, persuasive court brief, I jus tdon't know what is. Tyler, my eyes are wet with gratitude and pride. You're makin' your auntie proud.

Day One: Back East Excursion

2009-02-13T20:33:00.000-07:00

From what I recall, this is my first legitimate red eye flight. It was nice to experience. I kind of like travelling while I’m supposed ot be sleeping because then it allows me to multi-task—I either sleep while I travel or I read and get things done and just forego sleep for the day. This night, I did a little bit of both.

Although I must admit, JetBlue is one comfortable jet, I still couldn’t sleep without feeling clostrophobic etc. I ended up sleeping for a bit on the floor. The remainder of the time I was able to review most of the chapters in Lectures on Faith so I could draft a rebuttal to an adversary. We arrived in New York at 5a.m.—some of us less happy than others. I personally was taking advantage of the empty train cars by running laps and feeling first hand the effects of physics. When we arrived at Jendar (Meg’s friend who is hosting us this week)’s house, she made us delicious breakfast tacos and allowed us to go to sleep. I was more interested in scheduling my week of exciting events, calling people to set up appointments, finishing Lectures on Faith, and visiting a local museum.

The bums (Jonah and Meg) woke up at 10:30 to tell me they were too tired to travel another 4 hours to Boston (the bus was to leave at noon). Since I didn’t want to miss the conference just to ride with them, I headed down to Chinatown to catch an earlier (noon) bus by myself so that I could utilize a couple extra hours in Boston for reconnecting with old friends—or at least reconnecting with Anna’s Taqueria. That blessed establishment did more for the work of the Lord in the MBM than most things in Boston.

New York’s weather is OH SO surprisingly nice. It’s a beautiful 50 degrees, but it’s extremely windy. It was so windy that on the bus ride while we were travelling toward the Bronx, we had a slow up because an outhouse was blowing over into freeway traffic. A police officer needed to stop and secure it before allowing to people to pass through.

General feel: I really miss New York—not enough to live here myself, but enough to appreciate its value. As ego-centric I believe the people here to be, there is only so much self-absorption that can occur when you are around so many millions of people a day. In the lone country, it’s easier to think of oneself than in a city of crowded individuals just trying to get by. I have a strange love for these people whom I’ve never met, and I love seeing God’s children all together in one spot, all trying to progress and find happiness. It makes me want to do missionary work. I believe that is why the Lord sent me to metropolitan Boston; He knew that I would be more giving when I saw the sheer volume of need for Him and His gospel every single day. I’ve set a goal to give out 10 Restoration pamphlets while here. We’ll see what happens. Hopefully I won’t be as ruthless as I was on the mission and just hand it out like it’s water at a marathon.

(The former sister) Lisa Rogers and I got to visit President and Sister England on Valentine's Day. Who does that? It was a blessed experience with lots of memories flooding back and lots of love to go around.

MBM--We are his army, called in the latter days.

Inaugural Edition

2008-12-30T23:22:00.000-07:00

Following on the coattails of my wiser foresiblings, I apprehensively stick my size 9 foot into the blogosphere--a realm typically made up of married mothers and fathers showing off their childrens's latest antics to the rest of the world. Alas I have no posterity, although I have enough antics to cover an entire blog. Thus, I will commence.

For you non law folk out there, I will spare you the insanely hilarious Rule 19 pick up line, but I will encourage you to google FRCP Rule 19 so you know just who you're dealing with here at rule19party.blogspot.com.

Also I heard it's good to have a support group when yo're trying to change, so I'm allowing all people to see my New Year's Resolutions so that if I don't live up to everyone's wildest dreams, you can call me on it.

Why 2009 is going to be the best year of my life:

1. I will ask more questions of others than they ask of me.
2. I will volunteer regularly at the women's shelter.
3. I will donate more time and money to the church.
4. I will express constant gratitude to the people who impact my life, even in small ways.
5. I will study more and look at facebook less...maybe a couple times a week.
6. I will study more and spend time with friends less.
7. I will study more and sleep less.
8. I will study more and date less.
9. I will visit my family and other churches on Sunday.
10. I will make my bed every day.
11. I will be an indispensable asset to the business school.
12. I will kiss a boy.
13. I will not stress about money when it's not being spent on myself.
14. I will eat more homemade foods.
15. I will exercise more...at least three times a week.
16. I will meditate more...at least three times a week.
17. I will start loving visiting teaching.
18. I will not date anyone exclusively.
19. I will get an A in at least one class.
20. I will finally ask out the boy of my dreams.

There are probably more things that I will undoubtedly accomplish in 2009 that will make it the best year of my life, but I'm sure this is a good springboard.