Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Haiku Wednesday

I think you can tell my mood by the type of haikus I write. Obviously. I can't believe I'm sharing this; I'm not usually an art-sharer. I like to create art for my own benefit; so feel special that you are getting the first wave of Sara's public creativity.

Don’t dig in old dirt,
Except to plant new flowers
Where love and hope blooms.

The future’s brighter
Than any past memory.
Here’s hoping that’s true.

I’m sure there were times
Where life was a lot harder
Than I give credit.

My rock all along
Has been right in front of me;
Now I can see it.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

The Book of Mormon and Daily Haiku

I want to see The Book of Mormon musical SOOOO badly.

I'm going to New York in two months. When I'm there, I will see it for sure. Anyone interested in coming with me, let's rock the shows.

-SEP

Haiku of the day
Today was so long
And full of productive things.
Make it continue.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Haiku Heaven

I'm convinced sleep is like a temperamental train; you can buy a ticket, but if you aren't on the platform when it comes (and you never know when it'll come), you may miss it completely. That's what happened tonight.

So what do I do?
When I'm stuck on sleep's platform?
I write these haikus:

Okay but seriously: My modern dance teacher asked us to write a haiku and choreograph a dance that symbolizes the haiku. So I started with haikus that are easily interpretable through movement:

Snow drips off the trees;
Wake up from hibernation;
Spring has greeted us.

AND

I hear the tide crash.
It masks the loud screams of your
Unresponsiveness.

Then, because I can't sleep, I continued to write and write and write and write. I'm afraid to share these haikus because at one point I think creative Sara dug too deep and personal with stuff she should not be sharing. But hopefully the true meaning will be lost on this audience. And hopefully you'll just get a kick out of some really cool/really lame/really weird haikus.


Cap and Gown in hand:
What took me three years to build
Is so quick to end.

They said if I shout,
I would hear my echo back.
I wait, and nothing.

Playing games is fun,
But what if your opponent
Thinks it is real life?

Your words produce tears
That music can drink away,
But not forever.

This life is to live.
Purgatory, though, I’ve learned
Can be hell on earth

Haikus are easy
When they lack feeling and depth.
It’s overrated.

I’m sorry I went,
I’m sorry I stayed; Forgive:
It’s a dirty word.

Believe me for now,
But don't believe me always.
I don't believe me.

Movement, song, and sport
Were such a part of my youth.
Now what do I have?

It's easy to blame,
But harder to see the truth.
We cannot face it.

Russian raises voice
To her Chinese boyfriend, Now
Starting World War Three?

Pay me for my words;
Pay me for understanding;
Don’t pay for my love.

Two princesses here:
One has rocks; one has knockers.
Which do you prefer?

Never thought one day
I’d ever find myself here.
Don’t know if that’s good.

I wish not to lie,
But it gets me what I want.
You are what I want.

Remember the beach?
The warm tide and crabs at night,
Being young was fun.

I can’t forget you
Even though it’s been five years
You’re a part of me.

If I had said yes,
Would I be the person now
That I want to be?

Kweller Forever
Reminds me of the city
And you on the train.

Tulips in winter
And love in the fall. Summer
Is for breaking up.

My bed is calling,
But my dreams just inspire
To keep creating.

Friends come in and stay.
You serve them wine and bad cheese
And they go away.

I like you, I think.
But I think things that are wrong.
Perhaps there's no love.

Protecting her heart
Was what you wanted to do,
And now mine has stopped.

Lying never works
Nor does telling the truth, though.
What's a girl to do?

When you said "Goodbye,"
John wrote a song about it.
Now I say, "Hello."

Why is she still up?
And screaming at her boyfriend?
Break up all ready!

The house smells funny
Maybe it's the third day that
Food has been left out.

Why do girls hate girls,
When the boy does something wrong?
I won't ever know.

I hope I have kids
To shape, love, mold, and care for
Who am I kidding?

Some dreams work better
When you pretend they'll happen.
I do that with you.

If I was Iraq,
Would resources motivate
Your swift invasion?

Click here to read my haikus inspired by Facebook status updates.

News Feed Poetry

I got sick of tapping into my deep psyche (I'm convinced now that the more "on a roll" you get with Haikus, the more you dig up stuff that should be left undisturbed.) So instead, I thought it would be fun to use people's Facebook statuses as inspiration for haikus. Some statuses hardly needed editing. Some required imagination and interpretation on my part. Either way, they're interesting to read, I think.


Experience joy
Thinking I had no chocolate
Then spotting the light.
--B. Daire


What’s up with all these?
Cute babies drive me crazy!
I’ll never have kids.
--W. Lee Chen

Oh Sick! A brownie!
Wait, it’s just a bag of dirt.
This can’t fill my needs.
--M. Grow

I thought I knew best
Not to take that blasted nap
Why did I give in?
--M. Heaton

So glad for weekends
Recentering, relaxing
It has been perfect
--H. Haslem

To ski or snowboard?
The final decision waits
Until next season
--S. Wilson

Had a crappy day.
It ended better than hoped;
Thank you family.
--A. Byam Gardner

In my family,
Hearing: "Well that didn’t suck,"
Is a compliment.
--W. White

I know that He Lives.
The Redeemer gives comfort.
So does this sentence.
--D. Sparish

Don’t click on the link
That asks if you’ve seen a pic.
It’s bad; I got hacked.
--L. Weatherholtz

It’s time to go home.
Enough Substantial Writing
Fail for one weekend.
--J. Alisa

At one point today
31 people were here.
Big families rock!
--C. Taylor

And it came to pass
Tomorrow the PTA
Would rule the people.
--M. Fitzner

Shout out to law peeps:
Anyone have good cases
On Sharia Law?
--J. Alisa

Great Sunday today!
I love being LDS.
And I love the church.
--A. Paz

Behind in classes,
Stressed out of my mind. And yet,
We bought our first home!
--C. Hutchings

27 weeks
With Braxton Hicks contractions
Should I be worried?
-S. Rauch

Thinking of summer
Prague, Croatia, and Nauvoo
Paninis with friends
--J. Tibbitts

Most beautiful day
Every day should be perfect
Grilled steaks and nice walks.
--S. Lindberg

Delicious cookies
Given one hour ago
Already they’re gone.
--K. Post

Husband eats breakfast
Sardines with lemon juice, So
Is cookie dough wrong?
--M. Carmen Chinison

Dreaming of bathrooms;
Also, my car got stolen.
Wonder what this means.
--S. Zollinger

Those who danced were thought
To be insane by those who
Could not hear music.
--P. Deming

Cold and pouring rain
My car window won't roll up
Five hours to drive.
--H. Hassell

A guy in our ward
Looks like Paul Bunyan and sings
Soprano in choir.
--T. Merrill

My mind will explode
With all this Drag that's tonight
Bring extra tissues
--A. Wainner

BYU Singles
Can be compared to lepers
But that is unfair.
--Z. Pendleton

I'm back in Utah.
Not looking forward to snow.
Texas is 80.
--T. White

Friday, March 4, 2011

I caved. Lips!

You know what? I need to feel vindicated. So I found a picture of this girl's lips. (Don't ask. I'm all sorts of crazy--I mean crazy intelligent.) So please tell me I'm not too weird to have complimented her on her full, well-shapen lips. Some people pay good money for this:

Embarrassing Moment of the Day

My life is one big embarrassing moment after the next. I like to tell myself that I do it for the sake of comedy, but sometimes things just slip out of my mouth. Perhaps I just have so much practice saying ridiculous things for the sake of a laugh that when it's time to just be normal, I'm already conditioned to be ridiculous.

Moving on...

I went to Smith's with some friends tonight to grab some "stay awake medicine." (Don't tell the honor code office.)

As we were passing the feminine products aisles, along comes my ex-boyfriend Bryce pushing a shopping cart with some beautiful brunette by his side. I did the obligatory "Hey!" in an "Oh this is so not awkward to run into you, and I'm thrilled to see you again in such a non-confrontational environment" sort of way.

Then came the, "Has it been long enough that we just say hi or keep walking or are we going to stop and pretend to catch up" moment? He stopped his cart. I stopped my entourage, and so as to not throw off the rhythm of the moment, I placed my right hand up in the air to give him a high five. As our hands were moving toward each other I realized he was actually trying to give me a hug. We ended up looking like one of those renaissance promenade dancers that take two steps in, touch each other's hand, and then take two steps back, only with a jealous female onlooker and a really awkward back story.

Bryce then asked, "So what is this? Are we going to hug? Are we at that point?" So then he made me feel like I was the foolish one to respect his hugging space near a girl who, for all I knew, was his new wife. So I went in for a hug, screaming at my brain to not employ my usual manipulative techniques to intimidate the chick next to him and to get him to flirt with me back. I succeeded at that--and pretty much failed at life after that.

So then Bryce and I made small talk for a few minutes, and I looked over at her to cue him to introduce us. He did. I reached over the cart to shake her hand and asked to repeat her name because clearly it wasn't the embarrassing, bed pan-esque name that Bryce had said. (To protect her identity, I will not reveal her name). But yes, she repeated her name, that allowed me to easily intimidate and destroy her. But I didn't. After my quizzical look she just said, "Oh bed pan, as in short for "Betty Panda." Ok... My mind was trying so hard to focus on the positive that I found the most obvious positive thing about this girl--her lips.

So I did it. Right after, "Nice to meet you," I said, "You have really pretty lips." Oops. That sounds creepy. You better qualify that statement. "I mean, it could just be your lipstick," nope, not the right qualifier, though she did put on a lot of lipstick and it's kind of running off her lips at the top "or it could just be the result of good genes" Oh my gosh, I'm pretty sure I just gave her enough evidence for a restraining order. Look away. Just look away. I resumed conversation with Bryce and then got the heck out of there.

I could go more into detail, but it's just too hard to swallow. Anyway, the moral of this story is... Oh who knows? I obviously don't have the answers.

And because I like posts with pictures but I didn't want poor Bryce (or Bed Pan) to suffer, I will just include a picture of a T-shirt design contest Bryce and I entered once upon a time (and should've won, by the way).



Update: Click here for a picture of infamous Lipgate 2011!